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Teenagers So many parents of teens have said "just you wait!" But why? What are your thoughts on teens today?

View Poll Results: Do you allow your teenagers (15 & up) total freedom to decide on their clothing...etc
they have total freedom to decide 5 17.86%
they can chose but I have the final say 21 75.00%
I still decide on those things 1 3.57%
another opinion..... 1 3.57%
Voters: 28. You may not vote on this poll

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  #21 (permalink)  
Old 08-15-2007, 04:04 AM
Amanda's Avatar
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Good thread Tami

I let them choose but I get the final say. My son (15) likes all the "gangsta" clothes. I hate them and won't let him go farther than long white or black t-shirts and pants that are a little baggy. I won't even let him buy red shirts anymore as the friends he had in Vegas thought it was cool to be wanna-be Bloods. I put a stop to that immediately. Could you imagine if a REAL Blood were to get wind of that? He'd be dead This year, especially after moving away from Vegas to a quieter, more serene setting, he seems to have mellowed out on all that stuff. We haven't been back to school clothes shopping yet, but I can guarantee it won't be more than t-shirts and jeans LOL

My daughter, she's a different story. She's 13, so doesn't really fit the age criteria of this thread, but I think it starts earlier than 15 anyway. The peer pressure regarding clothing starts pretty heavy in 6th grade. She went from very preppy in 6th (Hollister, Abacrombie, etc) to something called "Scene" in 7th grade. It's not goth, a nicer version of it I guess. Dark hair, very choppy haircut, long in back, wearing hair extensions, dark make up. She would spike and tease the top and back of her hair, sometimes to the point of ridiculous in my opinion. But all her friends were nice kids and they didn't get in trouble, so I chose my battles. The one thing I did put a stop to was the hair spiking. Sometimes she reminded me of a rooster. UGH

She's going into 8th this year, and again now that we are in a quieter, more country like setting, she has mellowed her look a bit. Her make up is tamer and her hair looks really pretty. I think she's getting pretty tired of the dark too, even though her hair is naturally brown. The only thing I get upset with are the low rise jeans and high rise tops. Seems like every other day I make her change her clothes. LOL She's got her own style going on right now, kind of a cross between preppy and scene.

Like Bilby, I choose my battles, but choose them wisely. I watched how quickly a decision like that can turn on you in the right setting. Glad to be out of there and back to normal!

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Last edited by Amanda; 08-15-2007 at 04:06 AM.
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  #22 (permalink)  
Old 08-15-2007, 05:13 AM
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Amanda, I don't know what I would do if I had kids with the gangsta stuff! I feel it represents criminal behavior. I didn't allow my children to have an appearance of evil. It is so difficult to set limits with this fad so that the kids don't appear that they are law-breakers or emulating criminals, but yet are allowed to express themselves. Good luck to you. I can only hope it all goes away by the time my GKs are figuring out the fads. lol

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  #23 (permalink)  
Old 08-15-2007, 05:36 AM
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Originally Posted by DeBora43
Amanda, I don't know what I would do if I had kids with the gangsta stuff! I feel it represents criminal behavior. I didn't allow my children to have an appearance of evil. It is so difficult to set limits with this fad so that the kids don't appear that they are law-breakers or emulating criminals, but yet are allowed to express themselves.
It's hard in a large city setting like Vegas, so many kids are dressing this way to keep from getting beat up! I'm really glad we are gone from there. I can already tell that this school year will be much different.
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  #24 (permalink)  
Old 08-15-2007, 08:59 AM
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Makes me happy I choose to home school my kids... I don't have to deal with any of that and my kids don't care at all about fads, what's popular etc!!
"To live fully, we must learn to use things and love people, and not love things and use people."

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  #25 (permalink)  
Old 08-16-2007, 06:06 AM
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For me i have my oldest who is 14 years old.Right now she goes to a public school but has to make sure her clothes fall into a certain dress cods.She can;t wear any shirits that have spagehti straps and also the skirts have to be covering the main part and i think they want it to be going down towards the knee too.For the most part she is a good kid.She wears alot of short sleeve shirts and even her shorts are pretty long too.She is still wearing capris which i am thankful for.If she thinks her bra will show she will even put another shirit on underneath it.The only thing i can complain about is that she can go abit overboard when she puts her make up on,.That is when mom steps in and i make her take some of it off.Trying to have her keeping the make up looking natural here.Just like some of the other ladies i pick my battles but i also have final say in what she wears .

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  #26 (permalink)  
Old 08-16-2007, 01:15 PM
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School here is not a problem, as all schools have a uniform private or public.
In public primary school ds2, has a grey polo shirt and dark green shorts and green or black long pants and jacket in winter, closed shoes. ds1 in last year of high school wears taliored navy shorts or long pants, a button through cotton short sleeved shirt (like a business shirt) and in gr 11 and 12 (hes a 12) he wears a tie and jacket. Colours navy, white and green. Black leather sneakers (workplace health and safety for subjects like wood work and cooking etc). Gilrs have skirts. They both have a sports uniform. They are not expensive as it is bought in bulk and you only need a couple of outfits for the week.
I love uniforms as it brings out the pride in your school to put it in it's best light, your school colours are your sports colours and there is nothing wrong in being proud of yourself and your area of schooling. I do not feel in anyway this makes them lesser individuals and when they are away from school they can dress anyway they please. Which for my kids is ok by me.

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Old 08-28-2007, 06:21 PM
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My 17yr. Old Has Pretty Much The Same Taste As Me,so I Never Worry With Him. My 16yr. Old Wants To Dress In T-shirts And Jeans Most Of The Time. I Don't Mind But I Make Him Buy Some Dressier Clothes Too, Like Khaki Pants And Polo Shirts. My 11yr. Old Is Easy To Please So He Pretty Much Wears Whatever I Get Him, However I Want Him To Have His Own Individuality So I Let Him Pick. He Also Likes Mostly T-shirts. Now My Daughter Who Is 9[i Call Her A Fashion Diva] Is Very Picky And Always Goes Against Anything I Like. Luckily She Has Good Taste And I Like What She Picks. Ther Were Only A Couple Times I Told Her No Because Something Wasn't Practicle. For Example She Wanted Those New Tennis Shoes[don't Even Know What You Call Them] That Are Flat And Look Like A Dress Shoe To Me. I Told Her No And Made Her Get Regular Tennis Shoes For Gym Class, That Have Good Arch Support And You Can Run In.i Did However Compromise And Let Her Get A Pair Of The Ballet Flats For Casual Wear That Almost Look The Same.the Girls Here Are Wearing Them Now, It's The In Thing I Guess. I Do Teach My Kids To Dress Clean And Neat Unless At Home Or For Play. I Think Appearance Is Important And I Want Them To Know How To Dress When They Get Older And Need To Dress Nice For Work. My 16yr. Old Tries To Leave The House Even If He Got Something On His Shirt. If I See Him I Make Him Change. I Take Them Shopping And They Make Their Choices And If I Don't Approve I Tell Them To Pick Again. If They Won't Then I Tell Them We Leave With Nothing. I Make Them Try Everything On! They Hate It But I Won't Buy If They Don't. I Don't Have Time To Run All Over Returning Clothes For 4 Kids And With Gas Prices I Refuse To Go Back.
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  #28 (permalink)  
Old 08-29-2007, 04:15 AM
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TaraK, I think we have the same daughter! LOL! The other day at a beach shop she wanted to buy a T-shirt that said "Irish do it better." Uh, NO!!!!! You're only 11!!!!! DH nearly hit the ceiling when I told her what she wanted. She is 11 but looks older and it's only going to get worse so we are working hard to stand our ground now.

I like your idea about making them try on EVERYTHING. You're right--too much running around if you don't.

My DD got a pair of ballet flats for her "church shoes" for fall. They are so cute! I told her I'd take them when her feet grow; then I tried them on and discovered that her feet are already bigger than mine. It was nice to (for once) find a pair of church shoes we agree on!
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Old 02-13-2008, 07:44 AM
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Happy face

I let my dd who is 15 yrs old choose her clothes. Lately I have not had to worry too much as she is not into showing her body. She knows that she is able to talk to me and know that I will listen and before she doe she will tell me a head of time whether she wants feedback or not. She does alot of shopping with her older step sister.
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  #30 (permalink)  
Old 02-13-2008, 08:28 AM
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You are very blessed that your 15 yr old is so "good" about buying things that don't show every thing etc. And I am happy for you that you two are so close. God bless you both
I will take what I am served knowing someone out there is being served MUCH less
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