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Preschoolers & Kindergartners What a fun time in life! Time to learn 123's and ABC's. At the same time, they're leaving that babyhood we'll miss so much!

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Old 03-30-2008, 05:39 PM
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Reluctance to Go to School

The past few weeks, my kindergartener has been saying things like "I don't want to go to school" and crying in the 5 minutes before the bus comes.

I am reasonably sure that nothing bad has happened, that no one has hurt him, or anything like that. It just seems like he'd rather stay home and play.

But this is a big change for him; he used to be so eager to go to school.

He is reading very well, so maybe he is just bored there.

Has anyone else had a small child suddenly become reluctant to go to school?
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Old 03-30-2008, 07:40 PM
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There was a period of time when Andy became "depressed" at school. I thought that he was bored so I mentioned it to his teacher. She said to me that he couldn't be bored until he learned everything in the world there was to learn. Well, I still gave my opinion that I thought that they colored too much and didn't do enough "hands on" activities to keep the kids inspired. She agreed that he was advanced but said that they couldn't test him and move him to advanced classes until he was in third grade so that is when I started teaching him more at home, too.

Thankfully it didn't last long.

Can you take him and go talk to his teacher to see if she has noticed anything? It could be something as simple as he doesn't like who sits nexts or that he is not interested in what he is being taught right now.

I hope that you can get to the bottom of it soon. Good Luck!!

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Old 03-31-2008, 02:37 AM
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I definately would call the teacher and talk to her about your son's change in behavior about going to school. In my opinion something is up and if you don't like the teacher's response talk to the principal.

It could be as simple as they are going out onto the play ground with the bigger kids are out and being teased or bullied on the playground equipment.

I had sent a note into the teacher regarding my youngest behavior at home and was interested if she was doing it at home. I had a phone call 10 min after school started that yes she was doing it at school much more than the teacher had thought because she wasn't focused on watching. So I was able to get in to the doctor's that afternoon which started the ball rolling in getting a new Neurologist.

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Old 04-01-2008, 11:30 AM
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Hve to agree with the others and check with the school and the teacher.To me it is a red flag but it could be something small that is causing it.He is too little to be suffering from cabin fever.Good Luck

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Old 04-01-2008, 12:06 PM
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Barb--I must admit this brought back memories for me. Both of my girls experienced a period of wanting to stay home. In both cases it was something very minor, but seemed quite significant to them. I talked to the teacher and my girls in both cases and together we figured out what the problem was. In Paige's case all it took was a package of stick on earrings from the dollar store and a small note book so she was like the other girls.
Talk to Luke and see if you can find out what has made him change his attitude about school. It may be something that appears to very minor in the adult world, but a major mountain to a kid. Good Luck.
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Old 04-01-2008, 12:55 PM
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My oldest will be in Kindergarten next year but he has had small bout of not wanting to go to pre-k. He goes 5 days a week to a voluntary pre kindergarten class. He loves his teachers and has fun & learns alot, but says no one wants to play with him or likes him. His teacher says he is a social butterfly. I have noticed that he REALLY only likes to play with one child at a time instead of an entire group of kids.

I have some kindergarten workbooks at home and each day we do one page of "homework".
I did it last year and feel that he benefited from it when he started VPK.

I also think talking to the teacher is key.
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Old 04-04-2008, 12:14 PM
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Remember too, the weather is getting nicer out, and the kids would rather be outside playing. So that is a thought especially if he likes to play outside.

Also it seems like in the last few years the younger grades seem to push to get more learning in in the last part of the year. Almost like they did not get to where they were supposed to be by the end of the year.

I know since the weather has turned warmer, I have my 2nd grader complaining about going to school. I know it is in part due to the warmer weather, and also, since the weather is warmer, she is playing outside more, which is making her more tired. I am planning to limit her outside time a little next week just to see if things go a little bit better.

Good luck. Let us know if you figure out what is going on with him!

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Old 04-04-2008, 02:13 PM
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Yes talk with the teacher. Could it be that he sees what the older kids are doing/have done and wants to be part of all that. Maybe he is wanting the 'extra' stuff that goes along with school, not realising that he has to wait to get to that stage.
It's probably a bit soon for a countdown calendar to the holidays, but what about a week by week count down. Something to cross off each Friday night to see how many (few) weeks there are to go!
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Old 04-04-2008, 05:57 PM
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One thing that worked for us besides talking with the teacher is that we allowed our dds to stay home for a day, and then either dh or I would take them outside for a walk or something together. Usually after about 2-3 hours, the truth would come out. Then we would listen and eventually the dd would figure out how to handle it. Seems like a break away (a mental health day) gave our dds a chance to think about it, to miss it, to talk about it, and to resolve it. I told them that when they work they'll get personal days, so they should be able to take a personal day from school from time to time too. One thing I like about this approach, children often feel powerless in an adult world and while some of this is good, some of it is bad, so by giving them a choice it created a situation where they didn't have to rebel but instead work with the system they were under and figure it out, how to survive. This became more important the older they got. We did this from day one.
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Old 04-08-2008, 03:41 AM
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Well, I think I have it figured out. Many of his friends do not ride the bus--their parents drive them to and from school. So he has concluded that it's more fun to be a "car" kid than a "bus" kid. (Checked with DD--nothing has happened on the bus. It appears to be just his whim.)

I am thinking about making a particular day of the week his day to be a "car" kid, but he will have to take the bus the rest of the time.

Guess the novelty of the school bus has worn off!
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