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Old 12-11-2005, 09:43 PM
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Big Grin "HOLIDAY ETIQUETTE FOR DOGS"--Funny!

"HOLIDAY ETIQUETTE FOR DOGS"


1. Be especially patient with your humans during this time.
They may appear to be more stressed out than usual
And they will appreciate long comforting dog leans.

2. They may come home with large bags of things they call gifts.
Do not assume that all the gifts are yours.

3. Be tolerant if your humans put decorations on you.
They seem to get some special kind of pleasure out
Of seeing how you look with fake antlers.

4. They may bring a large tree into the house and set it up
In a prominent place and cover it with lights and decorations.
Bizarre as this may seem to you, it is an important ritual for
Your humans, so there are some things you need to know:
4a - don't pee on the tree
4b - don't drink water in the container that holds the tree
4c - mind your tail when you are near the tree
4d - if there are packages under the tree, even ones that
Smell interesting or that have your name on them,
don't rip them open
4e - don't chew on the cord that runs from the funny looking
Hole in the wall to the tree

5. Your humans may occasionally invite lots of strangers to come
Visit during this season. These parties can be lots of fun, but
They also call for some discretion on your part:
5a - not all strangers appreciate kisses and leans
5b - don't eat off the buffet table
5c - beg for goodies subtly
5d - be pleasant, even if unknowing strangers sit on your sofa
5e - don't drink out of glasses that are left within your reach
(my bird needs to read this one)


6. Likewise, your humans may take you visiting. Here your manners
Will also be important:
6a - observe all the rules in #4 for trees that may be in other
people's houses. (4a is particularly important)
6b - respect the territory of other animals that may live in
The house
6c - tolerate children
6d - turn on your charm big time


7. A big man with a white beard and a very loud laugh may emerge
From your fireplace in the middle of the night.
DON'T BITE HIM!!
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