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Old 08-20-2009, 11:32 PM
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Military Parents

Wondering if there were any other FC members who were in the military. Both me and my DH are active duty Army and currently on deployment in Afghanistan. We have 2 girls, Zoey age 7 and Olivia age 6 1/2.

I thought we could pick each others brains about how we deal with parenting and share any tips we might have that have worked for us.
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Old 08-21-2009, 08:30 AM
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Hi there....I am not military but my hubby is...with the Canadian military. He has served overseas in Afghanistan......I can not imagine what it must be like with both of you overseas....who is watching your girls while you are gone...We have many friends who are both in the service but here in Canada they try to only send one member at a time if they have children...sometimes they go back to back tours...still hard on the kids as they always have one parent gone...and hard for the couple to be away from each other for so long.

Hugs debbie
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Old 08-21-2009, 03:11 PM
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My husband is retired military and we have done the deployment thing. Our oldest son is in the military and married with 2 girls.

Our son just got back from 15 months in Iraq(3rd tour). He is now stationed back in the states with his family. We will go visit him soon.
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Old 08-21-2009, 06:21 PM
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Debbie: My mother is actually taking care of the girls right now. I feel so guilty about having to have her take care of my kids...she's already raised hers so she shouldn't have to raise mine. She constantly reassures me that she loves having the girls there and she wouldn't have it any other way. So your husband is in the Canadian military? There are quite a few units here from Canada. One thing I have enjoyed from being on deployment is getting the opportunity to meet people from all over the world. You'll be pleasesd to know the Canadians have a very high approval rating...all us Americans think the nicest people are those from Canada! LOL It's true! I think the Canadian military is spot on with their policy on not deploying both parents at once. While it may be hard on the couple, it's better for the kids to have at least on parent with them than none at all. Fortunately, since both of us are in I have the option of leaving the service after I have our next child and my husband and I have agreed it would probably be in the best interest of our family if I did.

Charlotte: I like your name by the way...if we have another girl it's very high on our name list. I just want to say that I'm happy your son returned home to you safely. I've been a part of far too many ceremonies to send fallen troops back home and every single one is a reality check that you never know when God is going to call you home and to cherish every moment you're here. I hope you enjoy your visit with your son and his family...just remember that deployments change people even if they don't show it.
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Old 08-22-2009, 04:52 PM
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Nikky my hubby also enjoyed making friends with many others from other countries......We still keep in touch with many from the states and australia. My hubby took part in an antzac ceremony with the auzzies. He and an american guy exchanged girl guide cookies while overseas...we have a pic and sent it into a girl guiding magazine....My hubby worked at the canadian hospital the first tour it was put up. He is a supply tech but pitched in where ever he was needed. The one thing he does not miss is the smell from the sewage pond......
Glad to hear your mom is with your children...that is awsome that you have a family member who can help out and I am sure she loves helping you out especially when she knows what a sacrifice you are making in your lives...you should be very proud of what you and hubby are doing...your kids will grow up better people knowing that. So do you stay on base or do you have to go out on the roads...luckily my hubby was on base and except for 88 rocket attacks he was fairly safe. one being 100 metres from the hospital....of course I only hear those things now.....

So have you had a treat from Tim Hortons????? We Canadians live for a double double or an iced cappachino.

Hoping you are staying well.......thank you for all that you are sacrificing for all of us to have the life we have.......

Hugs debbie
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Old 08-23-2009, 02:59 AM
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Sounds like your hubby was in Kandahar...am I right?? You mentioning the smell of the poo pons is what made me wonder. LOL And yes, I've had MANY treats from Timmy Ho's!! Some friends of mine were joking that we might have to move to Canada when we get back so we can be near one! The stuff is addicting I swear! They have the best coffee I've ever had from a coffee place and the best iced capp's. Man just thinking about them makes me wanna go get one! Hmmm....maybe I will! possible grab a Canadian Maple Creme filled as well!!

Nikki
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Old 08-23-2009, 05:02 AM
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Nikky yes he was in Kandahar...sorry i should know their are other bases and lots of FOB's too that he could have been on. Glad you have developed a taste for Timmy's....we plan our driving routes on trips by where a Timmy's is...LOL I am addicted to ice capps. So you are at Kandahar too??? Is hubby also???? I have had so many friends overseas...just about every tour we have someone we are worrying about....My daughters godfather was injured 3 times by road explosions but managed to survive and stay over...he has been awarded many medals but still has pain and shrapnel in him from the injuries.....My girlfriend was over and was in a FOB the whole time and still lives with memories of the taliban.....hubby was okay after his tour...just seeeing so much death and pain at the hospital was hard to make the transition back to life at home but he and I talked alot so it was not bottled up.

When he was over I had my kids lie down on huge sheets of paper and trace them...then the kids decorated themselves up as to how they think they look....we folded them up and sent them over and hubby put them up in his offoce to be reminded of the kids all the time. Every holiday the kids and I arranged to send a box of goodies over complete with everything needed to celebrate that holiday...no matter how insgnificant a holiday it was.....hubby then decorated tents and the hospital up and shared whatever we sent....he would then send pics to the kids of them celebrating.....he said it helped boost spirits...and that everyone thought his wife was crazy!!!

Do you get to keep in contact with your kids regularily???? a webcam on the computer??? I am sure that would help....

How much longer do you have to serve????

Take care

Hugs debbie
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Old 08-23-2009, 05:23 AM
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Yes I'm in Kandahar as well and so is my hubby. I actually work right down the way from the Canadian hospital and he's with the MEDEVAC unit so he sees stuff that gets to him from time to time as well but he talks with me about it and he feels better. I was an EMT back in the States for awhile and so i know how important it is to talk about those things.

I think I might use some of those ideas if I end up going back to the States and he stays here til the end of the deployment. His guys have already said that I have to send them craft supplies so they can make things for the holidays! LOL

I actually have an Afghan cell phone that I use to call them about every other day. My mom doesn't have a computer so that's about the only way, other than snail mail, that I have of keeping in touch.

I have about 3 1/2 years left on my contract but we've decided that after I have our next child that I'll get out of the military for good so I can be a mommy!!
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Old 08-23-2009, 05:37 AM
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That is wonderful that you can call so often....when hubby was over they got one call a week for 15 minutes.....thank goodness for computers so I could go over household stuff and leave conversations for the phone....


That will be wonderful to just stay at home and be a mom hope it works out for you....do you have 2 kids now???? We have 3.....

hugs debbie
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Old 08-23-2009, 06:45 AM
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Yeah, I'm VERY thankful that technology here has progressed so much since my last deployment. I was in Iraq in '03 and the only time I got to call home was the night before I was scheduled to fly home!! I was able to send a few emails here and there and I wrote tons of letters but that was about it.

I only have the 2 kids for now....working on #3
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