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Marriage & Divorce Whether you are happily married or have been divorced for quite some time, this forum covers plenty of relationship issues.

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Old 05-24-2012, 10:44 AM
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I finally did it...

.... told husband to get out. He is to get his name on the wait list for low rent housing. Told him if he doesn't I will put his name on the list for him. Either way he is gone. I simply can not take him anymore. In my heart I know once he realizes what he has lost he will straighten up. He won't be alone for long. A friend asked me what I wanted the other day. The only thing that comes to my mind is him to be a man or be gone. Last night he was mean to the dog then got into a yelling match with our daughter about being mean to the dog. When I tried to talk to him about it, it was the dogs fault, it was the daughters fault. Something in me snapped and I said get out. Nothing is ever his fault.

I don't know how I will pay the bills..... buy food but I can't continue living like this.
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Old 05-25-2012, 02:45 AM
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Connie Good Luck. I will keep you in my prayers. I did this same thing to my ex 18 yrs ago. I didn't know how I was going to make it either. But it just worked out and I still don't know how I put 3 kids under 7 in daycare, went to a job that paid $8 an hour and paid a mortgage of $560 a month and all my other bills at the time. But some how everything got paid and we never starved or went with out what we needed. The Lord has ways of making things work when we need him the most.
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Old 06-17-2012, 08:37 PM
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Connie, you will be in my prayers. I know how hard it was for me when I kicked my ex out 27 yrs ago. He wasn't a very happy camper and made a lot of threats but he never did anything. He wasn't at all the man I had married. He had turned into a wuss and that's all I can say about him without getting very ugly. I worked part time at WalMart, he didn't pay his child support and finally asked Jerry if he would adopt my two children, Jerry did and that is the only daddy they have known. I told Jerry years ago that daddys don't have to be the sperm donor, they just have to be the one there to kiss all the bobo's and talk the pain away. Some men are just spineless. I pray that all goes well for you.
Hugs, Paula
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Old 06-18-2012, 05:52 AM
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He straightened up a bit so I didn't push for him to move out. Bottom line is I need a job or a business, money to support myself and the kids. Right now my business isn't doing the best. I am trying to figure out if I want to start a business here or move somewhere else. I have so many things to decide my head is spinning. My husband is a wonderful employee, a great neighbor if someone needs help but when he walks in the front door it all changes. It is all about him. Right now we are in a money crunch and I am worried. He doesn't care that is my job. BS it is our job but he won't have a part in it. I need to accept this and move on. He is being a better father. He has a long way to go to be a good dad. Moving has shown me how controlling he is. He says it was his old job, or the house or the town, now it is the weather, the job, he has every excuse under the sun. Bottom line is something happened to him years ago, ( he refuses to talk about it) and he allowed some ugly stuff to stay with him. What hurts the most is I know him, the minute I sign divorce papers he will wise up. He will be with someone else if not married within the year to prove to himself and the world it was me not him. That really hurts. Funny is since I was elected president of the chamber he is more respectful to me. I pointed out to him that people will pick up on how nasty he is to me if he kept doing somethings. Last week he came home wanting to buy a building to make into a shop. Really? I didn't blow up or say no.... I said do we need this? We are trying to put a business in downtown with a shop. If you want it figure out how to pay for it and the remodel. I haven't hear a peep since.

I have also realized how I allow people to walk all over me. Working on this too. The kids are depressed too.... I really need some good and less stress this week!
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Old 06-21-2012, 07:17 PM
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You are a strong person, and I admire you. I hope that things will get easier for you soon. Don't give up! hugs to you!
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Old 06-25-2012, 06:29 AM
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Any ideas on how I can stay sane until we can get a divorce? I will be working at the spa every Saturday from now on. I am looking for another job while still trying to get a business up and going on Main Street. I get angry when I realize he does not want anything to do with us. Forget being seen in public together. This is the way he is, I can not do a thing about it. I pointed out that we have not done anything as a family for over seven months. That is outside of this house. When I point stuff like that out to him then he gets upset and angry. I need to shut up! He is in a mode to take care of himself and he has nothing left over, fact of life. It is his choice. I feel so raw.
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Old 06-25-2012, 03:07 PM
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I don't suppose there is any kind of support group in your town is there? Sometimes you can find a Parents without Partners group, and in a sense I guess you are without a partner. There are men that only want the good parts in a marriage but not the work and struggles when things aren't so easy.
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Old 07-09-2012, 04:07 AM
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I don't think he wants anything but a clean house, clothes and food on the table. I told him I am a wife not a slave. He treats the kids the same. The limbo is really hard on me lately. the crying has started, I am up for hours after the kids go to bed crying. I want a reason this all happened ... besides the fact he is lazy. I think the only thing he wants is the fact he is married. Or he enjoys it when I fall apart. Who knows?

No I don't know of any groups. I live in a small town so I don't know if I would be comfortable in a group here. Gossip.
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Old 07-09-2012, 04:19 AM
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If you belong to a church you might be able to go tob your pastor and explain to him and that you want to find something maybe close but somewhere else. He probably has some connections somewhere else that maybe he can refer you to. Without some type of help you are going to find it really difficult to help yourself and stay strong for yourself and your kids. Good Luck!
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Old 07-09-2012, 07:37 AM
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I don't belong to a church.
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