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  #31 (permalink)  
Old 05-15-2009, 11:10 AM
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Nell, I appreciate all the prayers I can get for those precious babies. This is why I will NOT do therapy on children. They are usually attached to adults and if the children are having behavioral problems, it is because of the adults in their lives, who cannot be controlled and many times will not admit their faults.

Thanks again for all the prayers.
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  #32 (permalink)  
Old 05-15-2009, 02:34 PM
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DeBora, your dgks are always in my prayers. Your dd too so that she will get the help she needs. I don't understand how your cps works. Here it may take several calls but they do unannounced visits so the families they investigate cannot "clean up their act" ahead of time and they can see reality. I sure hope everything works out.
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  #33 (permalink)  
Old 05-15-2009, 06:53 PM
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Thanks. I REALLY appreciate the prayers.

I discovered that I knew a CPS worker. I had a chance to talk to her and she told me that I could call the Ombudsman on the previous case that I called about since they gave my DD between 4 and 14 days to take a drug test. They are supposed to give 24 hours. I knew this because it is on their site. Anyway, I now know that I can file a complaint and where. There is a way that I can complain about the way the case was handled.

I told her that I ticked off the people in the office of that town because I asked the boss over the case if my DD was in a religious compound, would they take it more seriously? LOL (There was a Lorado, Texas or something similar case in Texas last year when CPS removed over 400 children from their parents and would NOT even allow the children to see their parents because they received a call from a female stating she was a young child being made to marry a 40 something male by her father. Come to find out, the person who made the call wasn't even living in the state and she wasn't even telling the truth. The bad part is that the children were living a totally different lifestyle than that of our world. They wore praire dresses and such. They didn't watch TV. Anyway, the families of the children who were removed and then replaced back when there was no evidence, have now sued the state. So, the state law has changed and the state cannot take your kids away without calling and telling you first and other silling things like that. I am sure the multiple days of drug testing plays a part in that.)

Maybe it pays to let go and give it to God and have others to pray. If the
Ombudsman decides that the case worker or her boss acted inappropriately by giving the mother 4-14 days to take a drug test and one of those tests were diluted and they still dropped the case even though one child still had rotten teeth to the core, someone may get into real trouble!

Thank you God for sending this person to me as we usually do NOT cross paths!
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Old 05-16-2009, 11:28 AM
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“He really helped me a lot! He said as painful as it is, I need to not worry about what I cannot control. I need to distance myself from them unless my DD is willing to let me do something. This is a time for me to turn it over to God and pray for them daily.”

DeBora as hard as this is your friend is 100% right on. We had a major drug problem with dd#2 years ago. Through FA we finally let go and let God. She eventually hit bottom and put herself in a yearlong treatment center and has been drug free for a long time. She says making her face what she had become made her seek help. My prayers for all involved
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Old 05-16-2009, 11:41 AM
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It would be so much easier if I didn't love those children to pieces.

Thanks again for all the prayers.
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Old 05-16-2009, 01:21 PM
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I have been there and am a willing listener anytime you need. Remember you can only control yourself, letting go allows your dd to deal with the consequences of her actions.
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Old 05-16-2009, 01:29 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by cau
I have been there and am a willing listener anytime you need. Remember you can only control yourself, letting go allows your dd to deal with the consequences of her actions.
I really appreciate it. I think the thing that irks me is that it took me until last year before my DH stopped giving DD money and enabling. Now, DD's MIL is providing a place to live, food, and evidently now she is giving them rides since they lost their vehicle. So, DD or SIL will not stop the bad behavior as long as the MIL is enabling. However, I have to constantly tell myself, over and over, that although the children are in danger and are going to suffer long-term damage from this, there is nothing that I can do about it.

With that being said, I am glad I was in contact with a colleague this weekend, who is a CPS worker. She informed me how to file a report against CPS in the manner in which they handled the situation by giving my DD days and weeks to take drug tests. Hopefully, the good Lord sent her my way to provide this information and that filing a complaint will do some good.
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  #38 (permalink)  
Old 05-16-2009, 04:27 PM
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DeBora, I know how hard it must be to let this go as it is your dgks who are being affected and they are innocent victims. Just remember that they love you and everything you have done for them is always with them inside. the time they have spent with you affects them in many positive ways a nd that can make a huge difference. Hopefully your complaint against cps will make things happen.
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  #39 (permalink)  
Old 05-16-2009, 06:36 PM
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Thanks! One encouraging thing is that research has demonstrated that abused/neglected children are greatly benefited by the grandparents in their lives.
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Old 05-17-2009, 07:41 AM
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Debora, I hope this all works out for you soon. The SIL should realize that he is hurting his kids by not allowing them to see their loving grandma. I'm wondering why your daughter allows this to happen. They're her kids too & she should have some say so in who sees the kids.
Keeping you all in my prayers & hopefully this will be over soon.
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