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Just for Grandparents Here is a special place for all our proud grandparents to share their stories with us and other grandparents.

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  #11 (permalink)  
Old 05-12-2009, 07:25 PM
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Hugs.
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  #12 (permalink)  
Old 05-12-2009, 07:44 PM
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Thanks!

The attorney stated, which I already knew, that in order for us to go to court, we have to have standing, which means that the GKs would have had to live with us for 6 months. She stated that we could go to court and take a chance that my SIL and DD cannot afford an attorney and the judge will give us the kids until they can get an attorney. By then, we will have standing. It is too costly a gamble since we don't know whether or not our bluff will work.

However, I know that my DD is too lazy to get her driver's license. She never renewed it several years ago, so if she gets pulled over, she'll probably be arrested. At the very least, she'll be severely penalized. So, I have made trips to her town in an attempt to catch her driving so that I can call the police and tell them that she is driving irratically and possibly on drugs. She may call me to take her kids then as her DH and MIL won't be able to keep the kids.

DH called DD this morning and told her that we loved her and that no matter what, we are her parents and are here for her. She said she appreciated it. She said that I could see the kids but that she had to be there when they visited. I am waiting since I am so busy with clients. I go back to work next week. DGD is also still in school.

My DD has mentioned, as recently as last week, that she does not know if she can stay married to my SIL. But, she has no job to make it on her own. So, I await and hope the drama ends soon. I am going to try to get DGS's doctor's file for my future purposes.

I was going to tell my DD's MIL that my DD called CPS on her a few years ago out of spite. She thinks the neighbors did it. But, I decided that if I am ever going to have any type of relationship with my GKs and maybe DD, I will have to keep tight-lipped about that.

Things are just so difficult right now with DH living in OK, him screwing up the finances, and now this thing with the GKs, on top of school and the stress of coming up with a thesis, I am just about at the end of my rope.

Oh yeah, I almost forgot. DH said that when he talked to my DD this morning, she said, "I just wish Mom had done an intervention instead of calling CPS." Wow!!!! I have hardly seen my DD since January and she hasn't seen her pain doctor since then. So, I have no idea how much or what drugs she is doing--if any. DH mostly noticed that she was accusing me of calling CPS. I noticed that she said the word "intervention." She also said she was afraid that she was going to lose her kids. I told DH that if she was using the word intervention and fearful of losing her kids, then she must really be worried about failing a drug test and she must really still be abusing drugs. DH said that her face looked really bad when he saw her the other day. DH told her that anybody could have turned her in, especially since the speech therapist called me and told me she'd been trying to get ahold of DD and she hasn't been returning her calls. DGD got into severe trouble the other day at school for pouring glue onto another child's hair. Those alone can cause someone to turn them in. DGD has had behavior problems and too many missed days at school and when she does show up, she sleeps all day.

I guess it is a wait and see game.
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  #13 (permalink)  
Old 05-12-2009, 07:59 PM
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waiting can be the hardest thing to do.. sending more hugs and wished I could give you one in person.
is your email the same? if not would you mind sending me it..
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  #14 (permalink)  
Old 05-12-2009, 08:46 PM
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Debora, I'm so sorry you are having to go through this. I pray that all works out for the best. If the kids are having problems at school, the teachers should turn it in to CPS & have them investigate what is going on.
Keeping you & the children in my prayers.
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  #15 (permalink)  
Old 05-12-2009, 09:04 PM
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DeBora, I'm sorry there is nothing you can do at this time but wait. Waiting is hard.
Prayers are being said for you and children.
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  #16 (permalink)  
Old 05-12-2009, 09:15 PM
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I appreciate everything.

I forgot to mention that I haven't seen my DD's van so I wonder if it has been repo'd again. Also, she called her grandfather recently and asked for money, which he declined. He remembered what I said about her being on drugs and not working. If she really needed money, she'd get a job and off drugs.

I know my SIL and DD are angry with me because I have convinced the rest of the family not to give them money for drugs. Everyone knows not to give her money unless a) she gets off drugs and b) she gets a job. If we have to work, it won't kill her to get a job as well.
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  #17 (permalink)  
Old 05-13-2009, 05:45 AM
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Debora I am praying for you and your family that this all works out. Hopefully the system will be in your favor.
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  #18 (permalink)  
Old 05-13-2009, 06:06 AM
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Debora,
This has to be really hard on you, but like Sharon said, all you can do is wait. Keeping you & your grandkids in my prayers.
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  #19 (permalink)  
Old 05-13-2009, 06:16 AM
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Debora
It all must be so hard on you
Thinking of you
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  #20 (permalink)  
Old 05-13-2009, 06:24 AM
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Thank you everyone for all your prayers. I went to where my DD lives and there still is no van that they have had reposed several times. I saw my SIL, his mother, my DGD, and his SIL hop in the MIL's car to take the kids to school. So, I am assuming that they no longer have a vehicle. I do not know what they are going to do if one of the kids needs to be rushed to the hospital or if they have other emergencies. I do not know how my SIL is getting to work and back, except that his mother is taking him. She is very ill and needs to be on disability, but cannot afford it. The step-FIL is an invalid. I do not know how long the MIL will be able to pay the rent, buy the groceries, cook the meals, and so on for a 2 bedroom, 2 bed, apartment for 3 children and 5 adults. I guess the only thing left for me to do is pray that God will intervene on behalf of the grandchildren before the DGD has worse behavioral problems and DGS dies from an asthma attack and becomes even more developmentally delayed.
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