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  #141 (permalink)  
Old 07-28-2002, 07:48 PM
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Linda, I find it strange that both your boss and "friend" have gone on vacation at the same time Do you think they might have a thing going on here????

Lifestar, I don't want to be negative here but I would like to share my story, I applied for disability in '98 and I still have not been approved! I last worked in early '95 and quit for two reasons, to be home with my 9 month old that was having a time with food allergies and asthma and also because I could not do my job of cooking and cashiering in the pizza take-out business. My husband was the manager and it was not a busy place, alot of days he would work open until close all by himself, but on Fridays and the weekends he would need extra help (one other person in addition to himself during the day time) and that person was me, but then I got worse and worse it seems, I was constantly dropping things and spilling things, couldn't hold and lift things, would forget things, and have so much muscle weakness that I couldn't roll the dough (or do other stuff too), because of all the problems I was having, my husband had to hire another daytime person and it seemed I worked less and less because of my problems....in the beginning, he did his job and alot of my job too, but it was not humanly possible for that to continue. If he had not been my husband and understood, I am sure I would have been fired! I did not file for disability at first because I guess I didn't feel the need to. I started the process in March of '99 in order for it to help pay for my insurance and medicines, I was turned down, I appealed it and was turned down, then I got a lawyer and had an appeals hearing and she turned me down! In the letter she wrote explaining why she turned me down, she stated that I can lift 10 pounds frequently and I walk my dog for 30 minutes each day (Oh, I get so mad every time I think about it!!) What was ACTUALLY said at my hearing was that I CAN lift a 10 pound bag of potatoes on some days, but I haven't been grocery shopping in almost a year! And I also ACTUALLY said that I walk my dog only if he absolutely lets me know he can not wait until my husband gets home from work and then I walk him 10 -15 minutes! Sometimes, that might be twice in a 10 hour day, so I guess that's where the 30 minutes come in. My husband works 55 hours a week (sometimes more) and the poor thing has to do all the grocery shopping, and cooks at least 5 nights a week, and he also does much of the cleaning and laundry, he pays my insurance every month that is $270.00 and will go up in January, not to mention all the medicine I still have to pay co-payments for ($10-$30 each), it is not fair to him or me and I will not give up! Since I failed to get approval with a lawyer, I have no idea what to do next, but one thing I plan to do is write my congressmen and tell them just how things are....I'll let you all know how it goes, but hang on and know that I am in the same boat, but I'm fixing to rock that boat!!
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~~Pam (in NC)
wife to Bobby (17 yrs.) and
homeschooling Bobby, Jr. (12) for over 9 years
  #142 (permalink)  
Old 07-28-2002, 08:12 PM
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Hi everyone,
It is so nice to know there are so many of you out there who understand what this disease is all about and willing to share and give so much encouragement to others. It's good to know that on a night such as this (11:00PM Sunday evening) when you hurt so much you can't go to sleep that someone is always on the other end of the computer to listen and help you. Especially people who don't even know you. Thanks to you all. I too have been on Disability since 1996 for various medical problems. Pacemaker, Fibro, migraines, depression, you name it. I truly believe these problems stem mostly from the Fibro.. The stress from just coping with it plays havoc on the rest of the body organs. I know my faith has pulled me through just about every crisis I've encountered over the years. I also believe He sends people into our life at the times when you feel like giving up; to show you that you are not alone and there is hope. It's also a time for me to think about how much worse off I could be. I realize time and time again that I am so blessed to have ONLY the problems I have and not the cross of alot of very ill people to bear. My burdens are light compared to others'.
Babs
  #143 (permalink)  
Old 07-28-2002, 08:29 PM
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Hello Babs and Family friends,

Sometimes it makes it nice to find someone on the other end of the computer to talk to with the same problem or position (disability or health problem that are similar)

Sometimes family members are the hardest to convince that we really are ill. With having to find a doctor who will listen to the problems and do tests ( which some insurance companies will not appove) :mad: To find one that listens too!

Always, know your not alone here either. Live is not easy and as some people say. Smile because people will wonder what your up too...

Hope this helps a bit. Keep smiling now, bye Cheryl
  #144 (permalink)  
Old 07-28-2002, 09:04 PM
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Post Disability & Bad Work Environments

I would like to know how any of you that are on disability, how did you get it? Did you have to use another diagnosis other than FMS? I thought of applying for disability because I was let go from my job because of my FMS. (Which is a story I will tell in a few minutes) but was told that Fibro is not a qualifying disability. I wonder if you can offer any tips. I have a great doctor who will likely say whatever I need him to (as long as its true). I have not worked since OCtober 1998. Is it too late to apply?

On another note ...putting up with jerk employers. I went to work at a large "christian" church in 1996 and they let me go because of my health problems in 1998. I was doing an exemplory job for them and handling the needs of all the program staff (9 people) and would stay late when necessary to get a project done. The trouble was I had a hard time with mornings so I usually was a few minutes late - I made up the time though. Well I was in the process of changing from one antidepressant to another and was going through a horrible withdrawal. I sat in my room in a ball and did not want to move. I was a mess. I could not handle anything. This was while I was withdrawing from Effexor before I could start the new meds. It was one of the worst experiences of my life. Well I told the church staff what was happening and that when I got on my new meds I would get better again. I also informed them that they were required to make reasonable accomodation for me, a person with a disability. Well they were so proud to tell me that they were a church and therefor were not required to follow ADA laws. I was appalled. So they let me go. Then I could not collect unemployment because I had worked for a church and they do not pay unemployment insurance. How is that for a double whammy.:mad: I was appalled that a so-called "christian" church would treat me in such a non christian manner. I thought of anywhere I could work, they would be compassionate and understanding. Nope!! Thank God my Christian faith was not based in that church. So I went home and have stayed with my children. I have been fortunate to have a doctor who believes in fibro and that is exists. I also have migraines, severe depression, panic and anxiety attacks. I do not feel I could work a job for any length of time. I can not sit for long periods, nor stand for long periods, nor walk for long periods. I get 2-3 migraines a week that require prescription treatment. And then there is the depression. So, bottom line, does anyone have any experience with getting disability and how did you do it. Do you ahve advice for me?
Thanks,
Amy
mominator
to Zander(6yrs) and Matthew(5mos)
and to a husband with a broken leg, 16 cats and 1 dog.
  #145 (permalink)  
Old 07-28-2002, 09:55 PM
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Fibro, etc.......!!!!!!!!!

Ladies,

I read through all the posts between yesterday and today, and have a very, very long prayer list! I am so sorry that you all are going through some of the same things I have been going through for the past 15 years.

Regarding disability, yes, file for it, but do yourself a favor and get an attorney! And yes, Fibro is a recognized disease according to the American Medical Association! You can search their website for the specifics on that (i.e., date of article, etc.) but get an attorney. Believe me, it is worth it -- in fact, here in Oklahoma I was told you won't win without one. It took nearly five years, but I did win and I just turned 47 and look about 35. (That runs in the family...) Also, for the lady whose attorney dropped her, get a referral from someone else, either a friend or the local legal association in your area or state. Perhaps you may even run into someone on this website in this thread that lives near to you and has a good attorney! It has happened.

About the bottoms of your feet hurting, yes, that happens to me all the time! I hurt all over and just am used to it. I cannot take most meds so the pain I experience is more than the average person's, but I have no other choice but to work around it. As I mentioned in an earlier post, the natural therapies help some, but nothing is a cure-all.

I am sorry to cut this short because there's lots more encouragement I'd like to give, but I need to get in bed and the pain is such that I cannot type anymore. You all take care of yourselves the best that you can, and remember that there are lots of us that are praying for each other!

With much compassion and blessing!!
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  #146 (permalink)  
Old 07-29-2002, 06:12 AM
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Hello Ladies and Family Readers,

I have not been diagnosis yet with Fibro Myaglia; as I see it. Do you have to take a special blood test or testing to find out if you have it . I went to a doctor who is a family practice doctor spoke with him about all that is bother me health wise.

After filling out form with a really nice ( mind you not all people who work for Social Security are ) woman told me what I had to do.

I wrote out a time line of all that had or is wrong with me. Gave it to Social Security with the forms. Someone from there called me wanted to know if I knew how I felt over 4 years ago. I told her that with OSA (Severe Obstructive Sleep Apnea) you have the privilege being able to function normally, in society, as normal as you feel and today what is truely normal.

To finally find others going through the same symtoms is truely a relief to me. I feel so much closer to my fellow man or woman as the thread shows more women seem to be having this problem then men do. It just makes me angry to not be able to find out what is really wrong with me. I am not sure if it is my autoimmune system or all in my head. Too many things are hurting at once not to be there ( in my head ).

Well, thank you for listening to me. Your all giving me hope that being with whatever I have there could be a light at the end of this tunnel. Have a good day now, ya hear! Cheryl
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Remember, God loves each and everyone of his children.
So your never alone in my eyes either.
  #147 (permalink)  
Old 07-29-2002, 06:52 AM
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Ladyimaille, Hi from Leslie9220- I'm so sorry about your boss stress. I had a very similar situation.( Because at the time I had a position on salary, not great but just enough to get buy.I was separated from my husband supporting 4 children + myself the youngest was a yr. and a half., and I did not want to lose the job + the health insurance. ) I put up with the c**p. I won't go into the gory details but .... 1. Verbaly abusive boss and or absent boss whenever it suited him often on the spur of the moment often for 3-4 hrs at a time. Often was not in for clients and would duck them if he knew there was a production problem and leave any confrontational situation to me. Not part of my original job desc. Because I was capable I took on extra work in the begining . and he sure was happy to give me extra... I was doing the work of 2 and 1/2 people across 3 different job descriptions.Often in on Sat. Ocassionally coming in on Sunday to help with a production run if we were backed up.(Usually my only real day off.) Anything I could do became part of my job description and I was looking for a 'raise' so I went ahead and did the work, put up, and kept my mouth shut. I did have fibro, and RA symptoms at the time and (not suprisingly) migraines 3 or 4 days a week putting up with the above. Believe me it wasn't worth it. But for my childrens sake ie. I wanted them to have a roof over their heads, food, electric,water and I was so scared I would be out on the street with them, I had about a 3 week cushion of savings above the bare minimum. I hate to be the bearer of bad tidings but it sounds like your boss may be, trying to force you out of the position, but he would much rather have you quit! Your 'friend" is no friend - be very careful what you say to her it sounds like she will use it against you.. I don't think your job is going to get easier just rougher. 2. Start looking for a contingency plan now... make job contacts now if you can, but not at work. Network with your friends, so you have a back up. Go home and start a journal ASAP in a and write what you did and any conversations you had with your boss that day. write 10-20 min. a day every day you work. You may need to be able to reconstruct this if he contests your unemployment . 3. Your 14 years in mean nothing to his bottom line.( Which may be the problem) If he can hire in some one younger,stronger and cheaper he will, believe me and he will try to make it look like it is your fault. 4.Your boss may or may not be having financial problems or his own nest 'egg may' be dwindling he will look out for his own interests and his business interests first. If he thinks you have moved from productive employee into the liability catagory, even if you know this is unfair or untrue you are unfortunatly 'being painted out of the picture'.I don't mean to depress you or scare you really, and I realize this is a very blunt but I really wish someone had told me the above. I hope I am wrong I really do.
PS. Thanks for the chainmail, forging,blacksmithing link for my son he found a pattern book and supplies from the Ring Lord. Thanks so much. He was thrilled!

Leslie9220
  #148 (permalink)  
Old 07-29-2002, 09:25 AM
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ladyinmaille,

So sorry about your job stress and your so called friend...It really hurts to be betrayed and I admire your will not to get back at her!
I follow the same rule. I always feel in the long run "GOD will even it out!"

Take Care,

janet
  #149 (permalink)  
Old 07-29-2002, 10:33 AM
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Tests for Fibromyalgia to Cheryl

Cheryl,
There ar no blood tests that can show that you have fibromyalgia. That is one of the reasons it is so controversial. Some doctors (as well as bosses, friends, family, etc) believe it is all in our heads. IT IS NOT IN OUR HEADS!! The way they determine that you have fibro is mostly by process of elimination. They will test you for other ailments such as arthritis, lupus, etc. When the tests all come back negative, then they determine that it might be fibro. There are a series of trigger points (areas of your body that are in pain when presses) that the doctor can press and if several of those points cause you pain than you likely have fibromyalgia. If you do a search on the internet for fibromyalgia trigger points, you should come up with the exact area of those points on your body. There are at least 13 (it has been a long time since I did the research so I do not remember exactly). There are a lot of other illnesses that usually go along with firbomyalgia also such as irritable bowel syndrome, depression, inability to sleep, etc. You may have one, all, or none of the corelating illnesses. The good news, if you have the fibro, is that you at least have a diagnosis for what is wrong with you and you feel vindicated. The bad news is that there is no cure. As I said there are doctors that do not believe fibromyalgia exists, if you have one of these, find another doctor who does. About all you can do for fibro is treat the symptoms with medications or other therapies. Chiroprators work for some, gentle massage works for some, and medications help some. The trouble with this syndrome is that everyone's fibro is a little different and responds differently to different treatments. For me, I have migraines which I take imitrex and zomig when I get them because I have found nothing that works to prevent them, I have depression for which I take celexa (anti-depressant) and I take ambein (sleep medicine) to sleep and flexeril (muscle relaxant) so I can get out of bed in the morning. You have to learn through trial and error what works best for you. I found a really good book that helped me and I did a lot of research on the internet and I actually brought up the possability of having fibro to my doctor. The best thing you can have is a supportive doctor. You need one who believes that fibro is a REAL disease and who is willing to work with you to find the best treatment for you. I also spent a good deal of time talking with others on the internet who have fibro. That is important to. I asked many others what they were taking so I could have an idea what was working for others. I have a wonderful doctor who I feel comfortable with and I bring up solutions to him. Be careful about support groups. A lot of support groups are nothing but gripe sessions and that will only make you depressed and will not be helpful. If you find a good one though, the others with Fibro can give you valuable info. Anyway, I hope this helps. Feel free to e-mail me privately if you want. I will try and find that book that helped me so much and post the name here. IT described everything in detail and tips for help. It is written by two women doctors who have fibro so they know what they are talking about.
Amy
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  #150 (permalink)  
Old 07-29-2002, 10:46 AM
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Re: Fibro Myaglia to PartyConsultant

Thank you Amy,

For being so fast in answering my question. No idea what I have. All I know is that my joints hurt all over, especially in my ankles, and the bottoms of my feet; especially the right pad of my foot it burns like it is on fire. Walking distances are hard on me. I have to sit down and rest. I have to exercise too but with not being able to get around that good it is limited to sitting and short steps here and there. No wonder I am so heavy. Depression surely doesn't help either. Isn't it funny the doctors give us stuff for the pain. But still are unabe to find a cure for what we have. Sending big planes into the skys. Paying Millions of dollars on research. Why are we still suffering. Thanks again for your reply. Bye now Cheryl
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Remember, God loves each and everyone of his children.
So your never alone in my eyes either.
 
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