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Friends Friends can be the lifesaving voice on the end of the phoneline, or in many cases, the end of the keyboard.

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Old 04-01-2003, 08:55 PM
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Do I call her or don't I ?? Help!!!

My best friend and I had gotten into a HUGE fight 4 years ago and haven't spoken since. I was 7 months pregnant at the time. She was very excited to be an aunty to my baby. My daughter is now 3 1/2 and Tannia has never seen her. The other day my father was at a dept store, and Tannia came up to him and started talking to him. She asked my dad to ask me to call her. I know the reason why she has never called me is probably because she was scared that I would tell her to take a hike! Now I don't know if I should call her or not. There was a lot of history between us, she would get me extremely hot at times, but then again, it would be nice to have a friend to talk to once in awhile, and I know that my daughter would adore her. I don't know what to do. Any suggestions would be appreciated.

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Old 04-02-2003, 01:46 AM
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First off, I removed the duplicate thread from Idle Chit Chat since this is the forum to place this in.


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I was in a similar circumstance. I am sure there is more to the story then written and that is ok. But in my case, after 5 years we started to speak and we are now phone friends. We do not get together (my choice) and that is fine with both of us. We speak once a week.

On the other hand, depending on the situation that got you there in the first place maybe bygone-be-bygones would be nice.


It could not hurt to call just to say HI and say, that your dad mentioned to you to give her a call. Depending on how that goes, you can determine if oyu want her back in your life or not.
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Old 04-02-2003, 02:16 AM
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Amen to what Shawn posted. A lot depends on previous history. Was this a one time thing when you normally got along ok? Or did she have a habit of pushing your buttons and starting arguments? You'll have to decide if you want to re-start a friendship and if you do, how far you want to go with it.

Friends are precious gifts but sometimes a friendship just "runs its course".

Good luck
Jayne
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Old 04-04-2003, 07:33 AM
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I think we had a habit of pushing eachothers buttons, but I think the that when we got into the last fight, it was both of doing wrong, not just one or the other. I think I will break down and give her a call tonight and I'm sure everything will go smoothly, I just worry that a few weeks or months from now, that things could start happening again, and right now in my life, I don't need the added stres. But maybe that is something I should talk to her about. And who know, maybe we have both changed over the last 4 years. Thanks for your input, and I really appreciate it.
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Old 04-04-2003, 07:36 AM
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Good luck and we'll be hoping for the best. We all need friends,right? You may be the answer to a prayer she has right now.

Jayne
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Old 07-31-2015, 09:34 AM
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Although this post is years old I will answer anyway.
I would call her. Apparently she wants to resume the friendship. You can always back off if you feel it isn't working.
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Old 07-31-2015, 01:58 PM
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Post Reply to older post of call or not?

It is apparent that your friendship was a very strong one regardless of the emotions you both were experiencing during your pregnancy. The fact that she asked your dad to ask you to contact her implies that she is reaching out the only safe way she knows how.
I had a friend similar to yours, but reversed. She was always the pregnant one, and I was always over the moon for her. Especially with her first child in her late teen years, shortly after she was diagnised with chicken pox. We were so close that when she called me to wish me good luck on a mathematical test I was having at school, I politely brushed it a side with, I'll be able to retake it another day, after you have your daughter at the hospital. We argued back and forth about how she was/not going to the hospital to give birth to her daughter. I arrived at the hospital 30 minutes later. Her mom greeted me in the hall way, and said, "right after you hung-up the phone, she doubled over and her water broke. The nurses addmitted her into the delivery room a few moments ago. I know she wanted you to be here. How on earth did you get here so fast?" She was my matron of honor. And as often happened we argued about this or that. I inquired about something I had heard through the grape vine, and she admitted to saying it. I had her sign a document that stated the cat she gave me when she moved out of the place we were sharing was mine til its death, and she told me to never call her again, and I obliged. Over the course of 20 years, her mom would correspond with me about changes in our lives. And I would always ask about L.D. Then one day I was on a social media site, and I had a friend request waiting. Like you, I paused at the want to reconnect, and on what level. Finally I decided to take the risk, and accepted the olive branch. We haven't seen eachother in person (yet) - it's been about 15 years. I am happy I accepted her request though, because her mom past away this past March, and she needed someone who knew her mom, had an idea of her pain of losing a parent unexpectedly (my DH does, his is four years fresh), and knew she would be "okay."

My question to you now, what did you do?
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Old 01-10-2016, 07:58 PM
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