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Old 04-19-2003, 08:48 PM
Txchef_fran's Avatar
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How do you and spouse do finances?

Okay girls and guys I want to know. how do you and yours pay your bills? Meaning do you have joint accounts and one person is in charge of all managing of money or do you have seoparate accounts and split the bills?

My dh and I have only been married 2 years and it seem money truely IS the root of all evil!! The only thing we argue about is money. I want to prepare for the future and my dh wants everything he sees right now.

Just wondering if any of you that have been married many years have any suggestions on how to fairly manage this issue??

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Old 04-30-2003, 10:45 AM
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Finances

My husband and I have been married for 6 years now and have done it numerous ways. Currently we have two separate accounts and I pay half the bills and he pays the other half however if either of us needs money we will help the other out. My half is pretty much house bills not including mortgage and home insurance but everything else including groceries and his half is bar bills (we own a bar) mortgage, home insurance and gas. To me this works out better.
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Old 04-30-2003, 10:54 AM
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I have the check book and pay the bills. The checking account is in both of our names. He has a debit card and uses it when he wants. We have a savings account in just my name. My husband isnt good at paying bills, tried it, but he would pay everything on the last day of the month and things were due on different days throughout the month. After that I said forget it I will do it. We had a lot of late charges applied to almost everything we pay out regularly because of his stupidity and not looking at the due date. So this works for us.
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Old 04-30-2003, 11:25 AM
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Pinkie Winky Finances

My husband and I have been married for 24 years. We have always had a joint account. We have always considered it "our" money. We have taken turns paying the bills and managing the budget. We pay our bills 2 times per month and usually discuss upcoming issues at that time. We also try to look ahead 2-3 months, so we can try to anticipate bigger expenses, etc.

The best advice I can give you is to commit to not blame each other about money problems but work together as a team.

Good luck!

Brenda in Oregon
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Old 04-30-2003, 11:54 AM
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The best advice I can give you is to commit to not blame each other about money problems but work together as a team
I agree with brendamo, DH and I have been married for 10 years, lived together for 14 years and have always had a joint checking account. It is considered our money not his or mine, but we do each get our own "free" money after the bills are all accounted for. I look over ours weekly, because we both have very fluctuating pays, if I need to save more for next week from this week due to lower hours then we get less free money. If we have a few good weeks, then we get more free money.

All big purchases are discussed, then put on teh "back burner" for a little then if we still feel as though we/he/I still need/want it than it is rediscussed. We never just buy a big expense item without think it over time!!!!

Karen
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Old 04-30-2003, 02:38 PM
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Husband and I have been married going on 35 years. We were a single income family until 6 years ago when I went to work in the "real" world. All monies are in joint accounts. He's no good at bill paying so I'm the bill payer. We each have 2 credit cards and can purchase anything we want but if it's over $20, it's discussed. I've made sure that I never pay for anything needlessly.....credit card membership, interest on purchases, late fees, etc. I'm not sure how folks can have separate accounts and bills. Marriage is suppose to be a joint adventure :-)
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Old 04-30-2003, 07:21 PM
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I love all your answers.....

I agree with the money being a joint issue so I guess it is more an issue with my DH. For example one time he purchase $400 oakley sunglasses (unauthorized as my mom would put it) His check was only like $500 so left me $100 to pay bills. Needless to say our electric got turned off BUT hey he had some cool shades. Grrr. I guess the real issue is how to keep my DH from spending out of control. His parents have always babied him and he has never really had to pay any consequences for anything.

I am at a loss.....he thinks everyone owes him. Surely I can not be the only one with this problem. I guess it comes with growing up but he is 29 so you would think he would have outgrown it by now.

Any advice would be appreciated.
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Old 04-30-2003, 08:17 PM
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Tx Chef.... well since dh can't control himself.... you can ...take full control of the money and give him an allowance.....and not give him access........ or.... you can get joint account that requires 2 signatures........with the understanding that all bills are paid FIRST before any personal luxury......or... y'all can seek counseling if you plan on staying together. Money can become a real bone of contention when there is one that wants to spend it faster than it's earned.

By the way, are y'all a two paycheck family?
If so, put your money in a savings account in your name only.. and live off of his paycheck. In reality, that is how it should be.
Couples with 2 paychecks should learn to live on one check and save the other..



The main reason for divorce is that there is NO communication....
so start communicating....

We have 2 checking accounts.. and we are both on all accounts as well as savings accounts... I pay groceries, gas, electric, telephones, water, sanitation, and cable. DH pays mortgage, credit cards, insurance and car payment....and anything major that comes up.

Since we can bank online, we can transfer funds between accounts at will.. There is total cooperation here on everything.
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Old 04-30-2003, 08:25 PM
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Great idea...

except we would have to live off my check as we cna not even close live off his. Amazing how I bring home double what he does and he spends double.

Right now we have a financail advisor who pays al of our bills and we have no access to anything so I guess we will keep that arrangement as it has worked the best so far. The only thing with that is we have NO fun money and that gets old too.

We communicate but there is no happy medium as no matter what I say I am the bad guy and he is just living life.

I have suggested couseling for this adn he doens't think there is a problem. Our pastor even told us if we were going to fight about anything to NOT figh tabout money..It is the root of all evil and it is truley evil trying to break at our marriage.
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Old 04-30-2003, 08:47 PM
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From the day my dh and I got engaged we set up a joint bank account, my wages went in there for savings on a deposit on our house for after the wedding, and we lived off my now hubbys wage. We were still living in our respective homes (parents). When we married we bought and paid off the house, we still have that account 18yrs later.
We never buy anything unless we have the cash saved to pay for it and it must be something we both agree upon, which is 90% of the time.
Whether we both worked or not we still share the same account and have never had any problems. I manage all the house hold accounts and still going strong on that same account at the bank
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