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Old 08-18-2004, 08:34 PM
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cynstenquist cynstenquist is offline
Eight Year Member
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Join Date: Dec 2003
Location: Missouri
Posts: 783
I'm glad I found you all too!

Thanks for sharing and for giving me more options to mention to my doc, next time I see her.

On bad days I have a problem with cognitive functions and really have to concentrate hard to remember what I was doing and why. And try talking on the phone, I sound drunk.

I wanted to mention that a year ago, I was accepted into a study group for FM and CFS. My doc wanted to study the effects of massage therapy on her patients. I was accepted into the A group where I received 12 hour long massages over the summer. I didn't notice any difference until the 7th week and I felt great. My mother came to visit after that and I was able to keep up with her, and when she left, I crashed. But at the time, my bad flare up didn't last very long. I haven't had a good message in a year and I can feel great pain on the pressure points at the base of skull, neck, shoulders and inside thighs. My insurance will not cover this kind of treatment but they will cover chiropractors. I just found a chiropractor who uses message therapy in his treatment! I'm a little leary of them since the last one caused more damage to my ruptured discs. So in addition to FM, I have depression (Zoloft), obstructive sleep apnea (Cpap mask at night & trazadone), liver dysfunction (steato hepatitis & fatty liver), insulin resistance (glucophage), deteriorating disc disease (surgery). Somedays I feel like a mess and other days I can chalk it up to life on earth.

And yes, I've had many frustrating conversations with family and friends about my limitations. And the attitude was "it's in your head and your doctors are quacks!" I finally told them that until the letters MD followed their names, they spent upteen years in school, had a successful practice and developed a better bedside manner, I wouldn't listen to their opinions. So, now when they ask how I'm doing, I say "fine" which really stands for (frustrated, insecure, neurotic and emotional)!

Tell me, guys, what are some coping skills you've developed (besides talking with psych and meds) that helps you through the depression when you dwell on your body not able to do what you used to do or what your friends are still able to do. I feel so left out and frustrated. I get so angry with myself because my illness wreaks havoc on my emotions and I feel like I'm so raw and vulnerable that it's a blessing I stay at home. sorry, guys, just a down moment. I need to get back to my painting & crafts. It's my therapy.
If I wait to be happy, I'll wait forever.
If I am happy now, I'll be happy forever!" Sally Hess

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