Other People’s Kids

February 12th, 2013 posted by Elizabeth Pantley

boy with hands in pockets Do you have a friend, relative or neighbor with kids who drive you crazy with their misbehavior? I think we all know one family that fits this description. It puts you into a very uncomfortable position. You know you can’t discipline the kids, but you want to be able to enjoy your time with their family. What to do? Here are a few ideas that may help:

Spend more time on your turf.

When possible, meet at your home. Let all the kids know exactly what your expectations are. In other words, My house, my rules. Be kind and friendly, but firm, “Hugo, in this house we don’t jump on the sofa.” Often the kids who misbehave at home will behave correctly when given rules to follow at your house.

Stick to the current problem.

Don’t try to raise other people’s kids. Focus on the specific issue at hand. Find a solution to the problem only to the extent necessary to make things run smoothly where your children or your property is involved.

Don’t stew and mumble.

It’s easy to gripe and complain about a kid’s behavior. It doesn’t solve anything. Instead, avoid accusing or blaming. Simply state the problem and suggest solutions. Once you have a plan, calmly follow through.

Perfect Parenting : The Dictionary of 1,000 Parenting Tips

Let them handle it.

Memorize this line, “They’re not my kids.” Allow the parents to deal with the misbehavior (or not deal with it, as the case may be). Step in only to protect your kids or your property.

Visit without the kids.

Do you enjoy the parents, but dread time spent with their kids? Arrange for more visits to occur when the kids are in school or otherwise occupied. Or meet at adult-oriented activities where the kids will need to be left home with a babysitter.

Pick your battles.

Ignore the petty stuff, focus on the important things, and be thankful your own children are well behaved.

Elizabeth Pantley (57 Posts)

Elizabeth Pantley is also the president of Better Beginnings, Inc. She is a popular speaker on family issues. Elizabeth’s newsletter, Parent Tips is seen in schools nationwide. She appears as a regular radio show guest and has been quoted in Parents, Parenting, Redbook, Good Housekeeping, American Baby, Twins, Working Mother, and Woman’s Day magazines. You can visit her website at http://www.pantley.com/elizabeth/


Featured Contributor

Cindy Rowe
Cindy Rowe (7 Posts)

Cindy Rowe is the owner/editor of Crazylou Creations blog. On the blog, you will find a little bit of crazy, and a whole lot of fun! As a FT working mother, she still finds time to create crafts, play around in the kitchen, plan parties and exercise. You'll find all of this and more on her blog!


Contests & Giveaways

Win Fun Stuff!

Check out all the fun goodies we are
giving away here!

Featured Giveaway

***WE HAVE A WINNER!**** Our #2 Anonymous Poster says: What an awesome giveaway! I’d love to win this and give it to my grandkids for Christmas! Thanks for the giveaway  […]   READ ARTICLE

Giveaways change every couple of weeks, so be sure to check back often.

Coming up!

Orange Carrot Less-Drip Ice Pops

Parents are always looking for ways to sneak some vegetables into their child’s diet. Well, unless your kids are avid carrot lovers, just call these orange ice pops — they’ll […]