Q: "My daughter who is approaching 9 years of age never gave the pacifier a second glance; however, my son (almost 2) is strongly attached to it. Taking the bottle away at 1 was a piece a cake for me...but then again he had the "pacifier" to console him. Now what? Help, I need to break him from this thing! I can tell he's getting even more attached than ever the older he gets. I need suggestions!"

Answers from our members:

tina wrote:

Cut very tip of pacifier off (about 1/2"), then proceed as usual. If child has favorite times to use it, offer it like nothing's different. (i.e. bedtime, in car, etc.,.) i did this with my son. he sucked on it occasionally, carried it around some, sucked on it a little, then after about 3 days, gave it up completely. never pitched a fit or anything, just kept looking at it and trying to get his sucking satisfaction from it to no avail. EASY! Good Luck!

Carrie wrote:

Both my sons, now 7 & 5 had the pacifier until about 2 yrs. old, more out of habit than anything. The way we got them to give it up was we told them that if they left their binkies for the Easter Bunny (it happened to be Easter time) to take to another little baby that needed it, he would leave them an extra surprise along with their baskets. We left them out the night before and when they woke and saw the special "big boy" surprise, they didn't seem to miss it as much and they got used to being without it because they had something to replace it.

Susie wrote:

If you take the binky away they will probably start sucking their thumb. My twins did. Let them have their binky. Their only babies once and they still need that security. They will get rid of their binky, blankey, doll, bottle when they are ready. Let them be.

Vanessa Powell wrote:

My husband and I JUST went through this last week. We have a seventeen month old boy who was very attached to his pacie too. We went the cold turkey route. It's not the route for the squeamish, but it works! This is the same thing we did with the bottle and the same as getting him to sleep through the night. For him it took one day, then no crying, but now he's into his stuffed animals a lot more. That's okay with me, better those then a messed up mouth from a pacifier. Be strong! He will survive the loss of his binky! Vanessa

Gina Fletcher wrote:

My 8-year old son had a favorite binky that happened to be recalled when he was about 7 months so I didn't feel bad about taking it away. My 3 year old was different. At 18 months she had already had 8 ear infections and her doctor almost insisted I had to get rid of the binky. I had weaned her from the breast at 15 months but she still wanted her binky. We lived in a very rural area and had rabbits that lived in our yard. I told her that there were baby rabbits hiding in the bushes and that they cried for binkies and asked if she would give hers to them. She took all of her binkies and laid them next to the bushes and didn't ask for them again (of course I had to go get them so they would be gone after her nap). By the way, NO MORE EAR INFECTIONS :).

Chemai wrote:

We waited until my son was a little over 3 to "nuk" break him. He had begun chewing the plastic off and I was afraid he would choke. The doctor said he would give it up on his own but I was not convinced. So, we told him a couple days before it was to happen that it was time to give his nuk to a little baby that didn't have one. We told him that the nuk fairy would come and take his nuks to another child that didn't have one. And she did. The nuk fairy left two quarters, much in the same way the tooth fairy would. Now at 4 1/2 he still remembers this as a positive experience and even is looking forward to the real tooth fairy coming. Best wishes to you.

Becca wrote:

My second son was a "binkie" baby. He could not be without it in his hand or in his mouth. When he turned 2 I worried he would be with it forever. Our doctor said it was a source of comfort and he would give it up when he was ready. About 2 1/2 years my son started chewing on the nipples. I finally decided to cut the nipple off of his 2 favorites and hide the others. At first he would sleep with the shield resting on his lips. The next couple of days he would carry it around. I told him that since he chewed on it he broke it. It only took about a week or two and he lost all interest in carrying it around. It was a lot less work this way than spending the time weaning it away.

Janice wrote:

All four of my children took a pacifier. As someone else said, above, I'm sure it pacified me as much as them, so I became just as attached! The first three gave it up around the age of 3, not without a huge effort on my part for months before that to break them of it. Ii think it's a good idea to start restricting the pacifier use to the crib for naps and bedtime. When my fourth child was 18 months old it was the least stressful because it was sudden and didn't drag out over months of trying. We lost the darn thing (this particular one -- the last one from the hospital -- could not be replaced). I was so sick about it. Thought it would traumatize my son for the rest of his life! After a difficult few days to a week for all of us, it was over. He is 5-1/2 now and perfectly fine! So, I think you should "lose" it. Put it away in a special place where you have the babies keepsakes. And don't get it out! Just explain that it's gone. Even have him help you "look" for it. It will be hard for a while, but just think how nice it'll be to be rid of it for good!

Barbara Kempton wrote:

Every child is different. My daughter, now almost 7, would never take the pacifier, she only sucked her thumb and still does. That is so much harder to break. My son, who will be four next week only took the pacifier. At two we decided it was time to get rid of it. We did it pretty much gradual. He stopped using it at day care altogether, at home he only used it at bedtime. I told him that I was not buying any new ones and as they got lost the number of passies in the house dwindle down to 1 left. He was told that when that one was lost the passie was gone. (He was always throwing them around, so he lost it in a matter of days.) It took about 4 sleepless nights, but he has been fine ever since and never started sucking his thumb. This technique worked for us. He also gave the bottle up very easily.

Stacey Barkan wrote:

My son was a "binkie" baby until 3 years old. It was hard to get him not to use one when his 1 yr. old sister had them as well. We tried cutting off the tips, etc. and nothing worked. Following the advice of our pediatrician, we picked a date about a month away when relatively few changes would be taking place in our lives otherwise. We told the kids that we would be taking all their "binkies" to the toy story and they could pick out one special toy each and then pay for it themselves with their "binkies" by giving them to the cashier. The new toys distracted them for a bit, they wanted their binkies, but we kept reminding them that they used the binkies to buy their special toys. They fussed a little, especially around bedtime, but it was much easier than I expected. All the binkies were gone and they did it together so it was fair. Just do it. At some point, we parents really become more attached than the kids, because they do pacify and without them we have to find other ways to keep our kids satisfied.

Kathy Green wrote:

I'm the mother of four 2 and 2. Both boys (18 and 12yr) wanted nothing to do with "passie". My older daughter, now 14, was also a suckler. I breast fed till 11 months then bottle, then passie. Took passie away at 2 yrs old, then thumb went into mouth till 12 years old. We tried everything. Finally she grew out of it. 4th child now 2.5 and still has passie, but only for bed. I'd rather have passie than thumb in mouth. It is her lovey and I'm not worried about it and neither is Dr.

Janet wrote:

Two of my three children had pacifiers. I feel it is best to just take it away. The longer they have it the harder it is going to be on them and you. This may seem cruel, but as you say he is growing more and more attached. They actually will get over it quite quickly.

Mary V. wrote:

My son was very dependent on his "binky" as an infant. At about 2 when he was able to understand we told him binky was for bedtime/naptime only. We would leave it in his crib where he knew he could find it if necessary. If he went to the crib to retrieve it we would simply say "Oh Christopher must be sleepy I guess its time for bed" If he was truly tired/cranky he would hold onto it and we would put him to bed even if he fussed about it. When he took it just for the familiarity/comfort he would put it back in the crib and we wouldn't see it until bed/nap time. Just before his third birthday we began discussing that fact that he was getting to old for binky and binky would have to go soon. We even got our family dentist involved. Shortly after his birthday we told him it was time to throw binky away. And HE DID IT! He would occasionally discuss binky like an old friend but never took it even when he would find a long lost friend under a couch.

The Family Corner.com WebMom wrote:

I have four kids, two of which took the pacifier. One was fairly easy, he only took it at nap time or at bed time. Basically, only when he was in his crib. He got so used to e taking it out of his mouth when I picked him up that he started taking it out and tossing it into the crib himself. :-) My daughter, on the other hand, was a different story. She was a "suckler" from the very beginning. I couldn't even breast feed her because she suckled so hard I couldn't stand the pain. I ended pumping her breast milk. Anyway, she reluctantly gave up her pacifier at 15 months. She was not happy about it, but I felt personally that it was time. Others will argue with me that she obviously needed the suckling for comfort, but she is 6 years old now and an absolute angel. I have no regrets. I did what Peggy mentioned below. I snipped the very tip of the pacifier off which rendered it useless. She threw the pacifier at me, yelled "NO!" and cried. It was heart breaking and I gave in a couple of times. The third attempt I made permanent. I took the last binky she had and snipped it. That was that. She was not a happy camper for about 4 days. But was perfectly fine after that. She never sucked her thumb or carried a blankie around. I guess it just depends on the individuality of the child. Good luck!

Peggy Hillyer wrote:

A friend of mine told me that cutting off the tip of the pacifier works. It loses its suck.