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5 Secret Parenting Time & Sanity Savers For A Peaceful Home
by Susan Epstein
There are several ways to help organize your family to make your daily routine run smoother. Here are some great examples of how you too can master your morning and the rest of the day as well.
Prepare for Breakfast the Evening Before.
According to most parents, one of the most stressful times of the day is the morning rush.
We all know by now that breakfast is the most important meal of the day. But most of us are so rushed that we barely have time to make sure that the kids have eaten. How many times have you sent the kids to school with a breakfast bar, or a donut? How many times have you driven through a fast food line to get your coffee and donut? Is this the way you want to be eating? On the run? With empty calories? Of course not!
So, instead of that routine, decide the night before what the menu for breakfast will be. Do as much preparation the evening before as you can: set the table, pour the juice cups, put the cereal in the bowls, etc.
In the morning, sit down with your kids and eat. Talk with your kids about their day. Go over the after school plans. Connect with your children. This does not have to take more than 15 minutes. Oh, by the way, make your own coffee and while you are drinking it and visiting with your children you will be making money!
Bathe and Dress Kids for Daycare/School the Night Before.
You are wondering if this is a misprint. Believe me it is not! This is how I raised my two children until they were able to do it themselves.
This is the reason the clothing industry developed sweat pants, spandex, stretchy clothing, and fleece, not to mention permanent press. The reason you have never heard of this method is because parents are embarrassed to admit that they do it! This totally saved my sanity and my kids were totally fine with it about up to the age of 8 or 9. At the point that your daughter, not so much your son, actually cares what s/he looks like in the morning before school, then you can put them in charge.
Just think, no more fights about "what to wear"! It has all been decided the night before.
If I could just figure out how to keep hair from getting messed up while sleeping!
Anyway, you get the idea. Make the morning smooth. Streamline your life. We are thinking out of the box, making your life easier and your child less stressed in the morning. Remember, it is hard for them to separate from you and go to school. Don't you want your mornings to be hassle free?
Making Lunches Once a Week Instead of Every Morning.
On Sunday afternoon, set up an assembly line at the kitchen table.
You will need:
Bread for as many sandwiches to feed the family for one week.
Luncheon meats, tuna fish, PB& J, or what ever else you and the kids like.
Labels or scraps of paper for labeling.
Sandwich bags, or tin foil, what ever you prefer.
Make all the sandwiches and have the kids label them.
Put the sandwiches in your freezer where the kids can see them and the labels. If you have a deep freeze with a top rack, or your fridge has a bottom freezer this works best for kids to see and reach.
In the fridge or on the counter have a fruit bowl available where the kids can grab an apple, orange, banana...
In the cabinet or on the counter have a dessert/snack dish available with portion size snacks available to add to the lunches.
The night before, set out the lunch bags or lunch boxes.
In the morning, before sitting down to breakfast, have the kids choose a sandwich from the freezer, a piece of fruit, a snack, dessert, napkin, etc.
You do the same- again, think of all the money you will save by not eating lunch out!
(Parent hint: if you prefer salad for lunch, while preparing the dinner salad make extra and put in plastic wear. Make extra chicken or other protein, such as tofu, salmon, steak, etc. at dinner and during cleanup add this to your salad. A few cranberries, and almonds, a sprinkle of oil and vinegar and you are good to go. Store in fridge and grab in the morning.)
No TV Sunday Night Through Thursday Night.
It's been a long day starting with that breakfast that you shared early in the morning. Your inclination is to turn on the TV or video game and you say, "Let the kids relax".
TV and Video Games do not relax kids; they relax you because you get to be off duty.
What it does to the kids is over stimulate them and make it difficult for them to fall asleep. It is also a parenting nightmare to get them away from that stimulation once they have begun. You know the drill, "just one more game, I have to beat this level" or "just one more show, I promise I'll go right to sleep!
Read with your kids. You know that room in your house called the living room that you only use at holiday time? Make this the reading room. Keep books, magazines, word games etc. in this room.
After bath time, go to this room with the entire family. Read out loud to your kids or with older kids, sit around and read for pleasure. This is very relaxing and soothing. You might notice everyone beginning to nod off. And if by chance they ask for one more story, have something short already picked out!
In our house we called this the Sunday to Thursday night rule. No TV, No Video, No computer games. Friday and Saturday night were freebies and per chance something that you actually wanted your kids to see was on TV- such as, the Olympics, a world event or something really cool, then break the rule- but save it for special occasions.
A System for Picking up Toys, Backpacks, Shoes, etc.
Each child is given a laundry basket, or bin that is color coded or has the child's name on it. You explain to the kids that you have a new system. They will have many chances and two reminders. However, if they don't comply they will lose whatever wasn't picked up for 3 days.
Tell the kids that by a certain time, let's say.. 7:30pm, for example, all toys, clothes, belongings, must be off the floor and into the bins and put back where they belong. At 7:00 pm you give the first reminder. Then at 7:15pm you give the second reminder.
At 7:30pm, you go on patrol with a big black bag. You collect everything that was not picked up. You take this bag and hide it in the back of a closet. You tell the kids that they will not get these things back for 3 days.
Stick to it and don't cave. Believe me, by the next night they will be rushing to get their things before you do. The key is consistency, scheduling and following through. You tell the kids the program. You tell them how it works. You tell them the consequences for not participating and then you stick to it.
You might end up with one of your daughter's favorite shoes. You might end up with a school book. Again, natural consequence and your child has to explain to the teacher what happened. Believe me; most teachers will back you up since they are trying to teach these same skills in the classroom.
What do you get out of it? Less stress in the mornings and evenings, a picked up house, kids that know the rules, kids that like to read and kids that know you follow through!
About the Author
Susan P. Epstein, LCSW, Parent Life Coach, works with parents looking to get control of their family life. Susan is an expert in the areas of family dynamics, parenting and child development and my unique blend of therapy and coaching combine to make her a powerful catalyst for change. Through thoughtful and sensitive exploration and perspective, her clients learn to trust their intuition, confront their fears, plan effectively, and step into their families and out into the world to claim their lives and dreams.
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