Friendships of Women by Dee Brestin Workbook

[bluebird]

I am struggling with friendships in our community. I have been down this road but this time I want to learn from it.

I am very hurt the way the community and people we thought we were friends with, dh's coworkers ..... and dd's service dog. Yesterday we saw some 'friends' who have been VERY distant lately. Found out the baby had surgery. No one in the community thought to tell us. Plus the 'friends' and baby have been home for quite a while. I am struggling...... I shouldn't be. The writing is on the wall. Where dh and I thought there was a friendship there isn't. Nieghbors that dh has worked with for decades will wave if they see us but they will not walk across the street to say hello or anything else. This is a family who lost a baby/grandbaby a few years ago at Christmas. I organized a carry in Christmas dinner for the extended family so no one had to cook. They could just be together. Yes, I was thanked. I don't think since I did a nice thing here or there that people should jump up when it is our turn. I am so surprised at the lack of everything here. Some people will talk to us about dd and Stuie but ONE family has said what can I do to help?

[bluebird]

I am going to jump to chapter 9, roses and alligators.

The text says to quiet your heart before God.
ACTS
Adoration..... praise God
Confession..... confess any know sin in your life and turn from it. Are there any 'thorns' with grieves others?
Thanksgiving.... Thank God for three ways He has intervened in your life.
Supplication.... Ask Him for wisdom with this lesson.

I do have a 'problem' with the confession. I know I have not been the best DIL or daughter. I do believe with my heart I was the best I could be with the stresses both families put on me. I struggle with this.

What is the difference between a alligator and a rose?

Everything! An alligator hunts to feed. Hurting they don't understand, they are out for themselves only.

Roses, smell sweet but do have thorns. In the same way we all have feet of clay.

Maybe I need to remember that with our young friends? I don't know. When the doctor moved up she c section we were the last people they told. I think something is going on here. Maybe the family wants to be with people thier own age group? This is very possible. It does confuse me since the people our 'friends' like to friend with are in the wife swapping group. Our 'friends' don't do this. They are disgusted about it as we are. ?????? Maybe it is the wisdom that we have learned by being older? We won't friend with people who do those sort of things. Sin of that sort can and does rub off on you.

What are different ways of handling conflict with a rose?

[bluebird]

bump

[mom]

I have noticed how hard it is to make a true friendship. In my prior church I had difficulty gaining friends. It seemed no one wanted to go deeper than merely a shallow friendship,which I would call an aquiantance not a true friend.

"Mom"

[kymmie331]

I wonder at times about true friends it seems these days everyone is just out for themselves..it's so sad.How are things now?

[mom]

Hi Kymmie331,

Things in my new church are better, no deep friendships yet, but a much more pleasant environment.

Blessings,
Dawn

[bluebird]

The only thing that has changed here is me. I don't have freinds in this community and I accept it. I don't like it but I accept it. I will be polite to people and live my life.

We had a interview with a very large newspaper this week. Okay large for here! We were honest, not whiny or pouty. We talked about how dd's life has changed with a service dog, the nasty mail we have recieved, the lack of community support, dd's future plans. Hours of talking to this reporter. The article will be out late this week. I can post a link if anyone wants to read it. I guess you can say I have taken off my rose colored glasses. This is what life is here. I am very thankful for my online friends!

[Sueanne]

I live in a community where everyone is friendly. Since we are all here far from family & old friends most want to form close attachments. When I first moved here I was much younger than most and everyone was well and healthy. Now that they are sickly it is hard to watch them passing away. I have learned not to get to involved in everyones health problems since it was depressing..
Now that new retires are moving in and are younger I am making new friendships again.
_______
Sueanne

[mom]

Bluebird,

How are you doing? I sure don't want to come across nosy or rude, but am curious, sometimes you elude to your daughter and a service dog and since I am somewhat new on the forums I really can't piece together what you may be referring to.

I would really like to be able to understand your situation if you would like to share it with me. If not I understand.

Blessings,
Dawn