childless lady

joyfulmelody · #1 (**permalink**) 09-05-2007, 12:45 PM

I just want to express my thoughts. I'm in my late forties and my husband and I did not have any children. Some of it was we were unable to have children and some was by choice. But you know I always thought what it would be like to have a child. Would he or she look like me or my husband. So I am asking is there other women that did not have children by choice? I feel like I am the only one. When people ask me If I have children I feel bad saying I don't. I know now I wished I did have children not because I felt bad, I think I missed something special in my life.

KSJEn6891 · #2 (**permalink**) 09-05-2007, 01:02 PM

I sent you a message privately.
If you have pets, you have children.
There's no shame in calling your pets your children, for in many ways they are children.

joyfulmelody · #3 (**permalink**) 09-05-2007, 02:51 PM

Thanks for your reply. I do have two dogs!! They are my kids. I love my dogs very much. They get alot of attention.

Haleys grandmom · #4 (**permalink**) 09-05-2007, 03:18 PM

I'm in the same shoe Melody, I can't have children I lost one right after we were married. but, I've been the mother to many because we were foster parents. Plus, Many grandchildren that are my dh 's by previous marriges. Now we are raising our granddaughter so her mom can go bac k in the service and further her education.No matter where you turn there will always be a child you can help,and love.

joyfulmelody · #5 (**permalink**) 09-06-2007, 07:01 AM

Haleys Gramma
I bet your grandaughter gives you alot of joy! I know I always couldn't wait to see my grandma. She passed away a few years ago and I miss her terribly. Thanks for your reply.
Joy

**AnnaInOhio** · #6 (**permalink**) 09-07-2007, 06:37 AM

Joyfulmelody

I am 44, my dh is 49 and we don't have children either. When we got married in our 20's we said we'd wait a few years till we were more financially stable and then it just never did happen and like you, I feel out of place when people ask me if I have children and when little children ask if I have grandchildren, LOL! We do have 3 dogs that are our children and lots of nieces and nephews. Dh gets depressed on Fathers Day when all his friends are celebrating that special day and he doesn't have children to celebrate with. His own father passed away 13 years ago.

Anna

boosted98mitsu · #7 (**permalink**) 09-07-2007, 08:29 AM

I am 33 & my husband is 27 and we have been "trying" unsuccessfully to have children. We are now at the point where we are ok that it may never happen, but we are constantly asked about it. They don't understand why we don't pursue it medically. We just think that if it was meant to be then it will. I know they mean well but it is hard to be "ok" with it when others think you shouldn't be.

**AnnaInOhio** · #8 (**permalink**) 09-07-2007, 10:01 AM

Same here and the same with the few other couples we are friends with who have never had children... of all our friends none of us chose to be childless, as far as I'm concerned it was simply God's will.

Anna

afpresley · #9 (**permalink**) 09-07-2007, 07:48 PM

i agree but i tell you what joyful melody i will adopt you and i would be glad to send you cards in things on your birthday, and on holidays in share things that my granddaughters tell like to day she came in from kindergarden in she ssaid mamaw guess what this boy tried to kiss me in class today but i pushed his old kissy face away from me. i have laughed all day at that one. but put your arms around you in give you a great big hug from your adopted grammy of 52.
hugs annie

joyfulmelody · #10 (**permalink**) 09-08-2007, 11:43 AM

That's what I think too. It was God's will to either have children or not. I see on TV that these kids get abused and I just think why would anyone hurt a child? I just want to wrap my arms around them and protect and love them. Sometimes it's not fair. But I just think "God please take care of that child."
And to AFPresely (Annie) I would be happy to be your adopted granddaughter. I took care of my grandma for about 7-8 years until God took her to heaven. I miss her. So I am giving you hugs back.
You really made my day!! Thanks. Joyfulmelody