I met this girl a few months ago. We'd been hanging out as part of a group for a while, then recently started just hanging out together and texting each other basically all day.
After a few weeks of this, I asked if she wanted to be more than friends, and she did. We went on two dates after that. After the first one, she went on about how much fun she had and how she couldn't wait to see me again. She seemed really excited about me in general ("I had so much fun last night" etc.). But, after the second one, I asked her if she had fun, but she just said she was "struggling with the more than friends thing".
I tried to give her some time to think, but I couldn't help it and started asking questions. The only reason she would give is that she "thought she liked me that way, but now she doesn't think she does". When I asked her what caused her to change her mind, she said "You're cute, interesting, nice, and funny, so I don't really know why I don't like you in that way."
So, I was just wondering if anyone could give me some insight into what could possibly be going through her mind. I don't understand how she can list a bunch of reasons to like me, but then say that she doesn't.
I'm just so confused, and I feel like there must be something she isn't telling me. It's like she instantly went from being all excited to "feeling awkward".
Most importantly, I'm wondering if there's any hope...
Thanks!
__________________
Eat, drink, and be social with Tasty Boston Singles Dining Network.
Sorry I have no ideas on that one, I guess you can only push so far for information and if she's not willing to give it that's up to her, maybe she herself just doesn't know what she wants.
Maybe it's time to just keep looking, you can't force feelings.
Good luck
Good answer Bilby.
krst451,
Unfortunately there are no hand books on relationships - regardless of the type. It could be the girl thought she was ready for more than friendship, really does enjoy the time with you, but might not really be certain what she is or is not looking for in relationships. It may also be peer pressure from other sources. It sounds like she was trying to be very honest with you and not hurt your feelings (from what you posted). Maybe you should not ask any further questions of the time together and just let things be as they are - giving you both time to explore the newness of your friend / relation ship. I suggest that you give yourself and your friend time to see if the "ship" matures, in the mean time go out with other friends and other suitable people...It just may be that someone is really interested in you already. I was seeing someone else when I met my DH, I didn't know at the time that i would ever be married let alone to my DH - that's just how weird relationships are. There is always hope, but maybe not exactly with this person
__________________ LIFE means...
Living
In
Faithful
Endeavors
is she a widow? Divorced for a short time?
maybe down deep she wanted more than a friendship, but guilt took control and she is scared. Maybe she felt a chemistry btw the 2 of you but it scares her and if guilt is playng a part of it, she is running from it.
I don't know, but it something to think about.
Ask her if she wants to see you again or not and that she needs to be up front with you.
Hopefully she will be, and you can find something out. Is she worth waiting around for? if not then move on, if she is, give her another chance before closing the door.
wishing you the best.
oh, how old are you, and how old is she? sometimes age can play a factor as well.