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Some suggestions if you have to have the party together:
-separate cake (or cupcakes for each child) maybe they could help decorate their own
-special balloon that they pick for their chair (disney characters are a great treat!)
-separate time to open gifts
-treats or snacks they get to choose (chip flavor, ice cream flavor, etc.)
Maybe on their actual birthday you could have the closer relatives (grandparents?) over for a cake on their special day to keep some individual special time.
I like the idea of having individual parties for their friends when they are older, but of course that gets a little expensive as you mention, but for the years that they are young and just into the fun things (like opening gifts!!) they probably won't care when they get to celebrate. I would try to do something special for each child for both their individual day and the combo party. If it looks like they don't like sharing then maybe you'll have to reconsider sharing them.
My cousins share a birthday (5&3) and they don't mind a bit sharing, but their mom also makes their own birthday special for them too with their favorite meal and cake!!!
Good luck in deciding what to do. Personally I'm in favour of individual parties, but we're such a small family that so far it's worked out this way!
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