[ellenmelon]

My dh has the cleanest mouth of anyone I know. He uses Aw Nuts when something doesn't go right. Horsehonky for when he doesn't believe something. But most of the time he just refrains. He pretty much follows that adage, Let your yes be a yes and your no a no and nothing in between.

My mil (his mom of course) said she pictures that unfoul item coming out of the mouth of the person using that foul word and that alone makes her not want to use any foul words. Her conversation if very G rated and very pleasant and interesting. Everyone is comfortable around her.

I took a look at some cell phone and IM text messages that the girls and boys were sending back and forth. It was vulgar. And I have heard the elementary school bus and believe me, even at that level, the f word is in common use. So it is going to be a determined effort on all our parts.

Our kids truly are little sponges and they will pick up on all of it no matter how mild the expletive. What has cured me? I am getting much much better. Hearing my words in their mouths is appalling. And I don't even use the harsher words.

So how it is said is often as important as what is said. And what we fill our minds with is often an influence. Songs, books, television, movies. Remember that acronym? GIGO (garbage in/garbage out) from early on computer programming. I think it applies across the board. It is really hard in today's society but no harder than back in Old Testament times. Was it Lot that had to protect his daughters from rout and looters? Someone did. they were outside the house using all kinds of horrible words and entreaties. Depravity reigned even back then.

There is a verse in the bible that defines mouth usages: Let no unclean word proceed out of our mouths. So unclean could be anything fouly uttered. This even sets the standard for dirty jokes.

When my kids were little I used a dab of soap on their tongues. Lead by example as best we can and let them know when and where they have crossed the lines that you have drawn for them.

Have I succeeded? Oh that I wish I could say so. But I can say that compared to last year, last month, last week, that the battle is being won. Pressure to get things done, pressure to get somewhere, pressure to have things go right, all these things would cause me to blow a fuse and utter things I would rather not. So slowing down my life helped a great great deal!

One other phrase that a 6th grade teacher uses instead of (fill in whatever word you want) is 'That is Less Than Optimal.'