Wow! I need this thread too! My mom died in Dec. Now my dad is having health problems. He says he has 'something' in his stomach.
why he won't call it cancer I have no idea. He insists on staying with the VA hospital six hours from here. They are so overworked and understaffed....... dad hasn't been able to talk to HIS doctor since June. We never got all the biopsies..... I am pushing dad to make final plans. He is to have another scope done on the fifth and I have a very funny feeling about it. Dad simply does not care. I love him, he is my father but......he is also a control freak. He lied to himself, my mother and everyone else about how ill my mother was for years, decades really. If she would have gotten help decades ago, we might have been a family at one point in time. As it is, dad wanted mom and no one else. The hardest part in her dying is the lies. I knew mom was mentally ill but I never dreamed it was as bad as it was. It makes me ill to think she was shooting who knows what between her fingers and dad lied about everything. But..... she is at peace now.
Dad has cancer of the stomach all the way up to his throat. He is choking on food and liquids now. But he is still working. I think he will drop dead while working. When the illness catches up to him it will be boom. In a way that is easier than what you girls are living with.