|
My daughter, now 20 (pre-med, working full time, and getting married next year), went through the gifted program in school. When we did Girl Scouts for 7 years, we had an unusually high proportion of girls in Gifted in our troop, I think 7 out of 24 of them, so I have some experience with these kids. I also taught pre-K and even then, there are kids who are thinking differently at age 4 and 5. It's not just "what they know," but "how they think." Children who are widely exposed in the preschool years will know more, but that doesn't mean they are "gifted."
There's a reason that gifted is part of "special ed." It takes a different approach of teaching because the kids ARE different. For the most part, a child who is placed in the gifted class is relieved to find that s/he is suddenly amidst peers, classmates who don't think they are "weird" for the way they think. They tend to make intuitive links that non-gifted kids just don't see.
Be aware that her teachers are trained and experienced in dealing with know-it-alls. They basically have a roomful of them, and for the most part, these children have always known more than anyone else in their class and this is going to be a new experience, being with others who are as smart as they are. That takes some adjusting, but it's part of the teacher's job. And the other kids won't be shy about letting her know if she is too bossy.
Teachers in the Gifted program are surprisingly accustomed to students correcting them. It happens sometimes. And they know how to handle that with finesse, to let the student know that there is a right way and a rude way to do that. Don't YOU be embarrassed about it; it reflects on your child's intelligence and self-confidence but lack of tact (common amongst 3rd graders, I assure you), but it doesn't reflect a lack of parenting skills on your part. What you can do is make an appointment and discuss your concerns with the teacher and the head of the Gifted program. Let them know what you observe and ask, "what can we do to address this?"
Third grade is a big transition year in school, where the sugar-coat fun/learning of primary school segués into the more work-type learning of elementary school. It's a shame that all students can't have the environment of the gifted classroom: smaller classes, more one-on-one time, more creative process-oriented ways of teaching, and the creme-de-la-creme of teachers. ALL kids would do better in such an environment. However, gifted kids NEED it, otherwise they can become bored and atrophy or become troublemakers.
When my daughter (age 4 at the time) was in kindergarten, she had a delightful teacher who was talking about how words that sound the same can have multiple meanings, like pants or pear/pair/pare. My daughter raised her hand and said, "Like 'eyebrows.'?" The teacher said, no, eyebrows just has one. My daughter said, "Like eyebrows, the hair over your eyes. And like 'I-browse' in a store." I'm thankful that she had a teacher who could handle that with equanimity! Over the years, my daughter (and her classmates) routinely found errors in textbooks, conflicting "facts," and mistakes in everything from newspaper articles to the encyclopedia. Spotting things that are incorrect is SO typical of gifted children, and it is their nature to point them out. They aren't doing it to be ****y, they just don't handle inconsistency very well. "Justice"... that is, rightness... is very important to children at this age, and it is magnified in the gifted child.
Everyone has his own strengths and weaknesses, and your child will learn that in the natural flow of her education. I agree that getting her enrolled in things that are a challenge will help with that lesson, but I believe it is better to allow it to naturally occur, don't rub her nose in it. My daughter, for all her smarts, is not a good speller. She'd do the spelling homework, memorize the words, get 105+++ on the tests (including the bonus words), and then misspell the words a month later. She was devastated to get a B in Spelling and went to the teacher to ask why, since she had A's in all the assignments. The teacher said, you have put your greatest effort into all of your spelling assignments, but an A indicates "mastery of the subject," and you have not mastered it. It won't matter over the course of your life, because nowadays, there will be spellcheckers wherever and whenever you write. You have a brilliant way with words, and that will always be more important. (Third grade)
One of my daughter's friends, one that she went all the way through school with, was the eldest of 3 girls in a lovely but ordinary middle-class family. Many times, her mother would say "I don't know where she gets this!" Brandy could outthink her parents at a very young age. But her parents were bound and determined that she have an ordinary life, too, and they made sure she did Girl Scouts and sports activities and youth group at church and so on. Another friend, Kristy, has an equally brilliant father, often the only one who could keep up with her, and not always that! Nicole was the only offspring of two extremely bright parents, both teachers.
Interestingly, this past New Year's Eve, everyone home from college for Winter Break, these 4 got together and opened a 10-year Time Capsule they'd put together back at age 9. I don't recall what spurred them to make one 10 years ago, probably their 4th grade Gifted teacher.
I hope my experiences and insights will help you. It can be a real challenge, being the parent of a gifted child!
Rani
 |