From The Mouths of Babes - A Teen Pregnancy
by Amanda Formaro
" I got pregnant in February of '98
so when summer arrived and all of my friends were at the beach in bikinis
I was shopping for maternity clothes."
An alarming number of children are having children of their own. Did you
know:
"Each year, almost one million teenage women - 11% of all women aged 15 -
19 and 20% of those who have had sexual intercourse - become pregnant.
* 78% of teen pregnancies are unplanned,
accounting for about 1/4 of all accidental pregnancies annually.
* 6 in 10 teen pregnancies occur among
18–19 year-olds.
* Teen pregnancy rates are much higher
in the United States than in many other developed countries—twice as
high as in England and Wales or Canada, and nine times as high as in the
Netherlands or Japan.
* Among sexually experienced teens,
about 8% of 14-year-olds, 18% of 15–17-year-olds and 22% of
18–19-year-olds become pregnant each year."
Source: The Alan Guttmacher Institute.
"I thought getting pregnant and having
a kid would be so easy but it's not, even if you do have help. I love my
daughter with all of my heart but I wish I would have known it was going
to be this hard!"
Lisa's words are those of a young woman
who has missed her childhood. The Family Corner spoke with Lisa and asked
her about her experience. She was kind enough to share with us.
Q: Was
your pregnancy planned?
A: This is kind of hard to
answer, yes and no. What I mean is the baby's father and I talked about me
getting pregnant and made plans but nothing ever happened so we thought maybe
one of us couldn't have kids. So we just never really thought about it again
until I found out I was pregnant.
Q: Did
the father stick around?
A: Yes he did. I got really
lucky and he stuck around and we got married.
Q: How
did your parents react?
A: Well, my mother came in
my room one morning and started questioning me about why I was always feeling
sick and lying down. She brought up the idea that I might be pregnant. So
I took a pregnancy test and it came up positive. I called my mom at work
and told her. Then I went to a clinic and got tested and told my mom I was
pregnant. She wasn't really mad; I think she already knew. When she told
my dad he didn't talk to me for about a week.
Q: How
did the pregnancy effect your education and other current plans?
A: I got pregnant in the
middle of my freshman year. I finished school that year, which was tough
because I always felt sick, hungry and moody and none of the teachers seemed
to understand. When the next year rolled around I was still pregnant. I didn't
go back to school, I kept finding different reasons for putting off going
to school. Then when I had my daughter I could no longer go to school because
did not have a baby sitter. I don't live close to a school with a daycare
so I am now going to go for my G.E.D.
Q: What
frustrations did you encounter after birth?
A: It was hard for me to
all of a sudden adjust to waking up at night to a screaming baby and devoting
all of my time to her. Instead of having time for myself. It was also hard
knowing that I was young and I should be going out with my friends. That
no longer was an option.
Q: How
did your friends react?
A: Everyone had told me that
I would know who my true friends were when I had a baby. I kept saying "No,
I will still have all of my friends." But they were right. When I got pregnant
it wasn't too bad. I still had all of my friends, I just didn't see them
as much because they went partying or whatever and I couldn't go. Then when
my daughter was born all of my friends seemed to disappear. Even my best
friend doesn't seem to call me or even want to visit anymore.
Q: Do you
have any regrets?
A: I don't regret having
my daughter, but I wish I would have considered things more beforehand. I
was so careless. I had no idea what I was getting into, even though I thought
I did.
Q: Was
abortion or adoption ever an option/issue?
A: No, I don't believe in
abortion and I felt my baby was my responsibility, not for me to carry it
and then pawn it off on someone else.
Lisa was 16 years old when she found
out she was pregnant. Her daughter was born after Lisa turned 17. She wanted
to let other teens know "just how it is" when a baby comes into your life.
"My day is pretty much taken up. If you think that once you have a baby,
that your life will be great and all fun and games, you should think again.
I'm here to tell you from first hand experience that it's not going to be
anything like what you think.
The pregnancy was a very hard thing to go through. I was just a kid, my body
was not finished growing yet. Once I gave birth to my daughter things really
changed. You really must be prepared to get less sleep, have less time alone
and even if you get lucky to get the father to stick around (like I did)
it will still be a full time job. Once she starts crying, the first thing
everyone will say is go to mama.
"When they are newborn they cry all night. Then comes the fun part...they
start teething! Then nothing makes them happy and they cry all the time.
Think twice..."
About the Author:
Amanda Formaro is the entrepreneurial mother of four children. She is also the owner of FamilyCorner.com Magazine. Subscribe to her free newsletter by clicking "sign up" below
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