While agonizing with my son over his
junior year elective choices, I found myself reminiscing about the high school
lessons I had learned, and which of them actually transferred into
"real" life.
My mother felt it would be beneficial
to take a Home Economics course. Although I didn't share her zest for a Singer,
I learned to baste, hem and darn, and all of those other tasks I can never
admit to mastering. If word leaks out, the PTA will rope me into sewing troop
215's Cub Scout patches and volunteer me to design costumes for the First
grade Salute to the 50 States play.
I chose German over Spanish, but frankly,
after spending my days with a toddler, I'd find Jabber 101 more useful. I
can't say learning conversational German was a total waste, though. When
Hogan's Heroes plays on Nick-at-Nite, I always know what Clink and Schultz
are planning before Hogan romances it out of the secretary.
On the surface, you'd think that
Introduction to Accounting would transfer into my adult life quite nicely.
After all, they teach you accounts payable and accounts receivable, along
with general ledger fundamentals, but juggling my checkbook after monthly
expenses and unexpected incidentals finds me in need of Creative Bookkeeping
instead.
I can never understand how I can be
out of money when I still have checks.
The only failing mark I ever received
in school was in my Typing class. In my defense, manual typewriters led the
way in technology in those days. Carpal Tunnel Syndrome pales in comparison
to the Tennis Elbow that those contraptions produce. And I can't count how
many times I caught my fingers between the keys.
As luck would have it, Keyboarding 101
replaced Typing 101... the year after I graduated.
Abnormal Psychology was an interesting
class, but it scared the daylights out of me. Like any first year Psych.
student, I analyzed everyone in my path and diagnosed the majority as
schizophrenic.
On the plus side, I love to sling some
of the Freudian theories on my husband when the tides shift and I find myself
losing an argument.
I opted for Zoology as my Science
requirement. It wasn't that I had a passion for animal life, but it was common
knowledge that the Zoology instructor was cute. That's reason enough for
any teenage girl. The only thing my 20 female classmates and I learned that
semester was lightning round make-up application. By the blare of the tardy
bell we were painted, perfumed and ready to give his lectures our undivided
attention.
CPR filled my Health course requirement.
The coach strongly recommended it for the football and basketball teams,
so it became an absolute requirement for any 16-year-old girl who desired
a social life. My dreams of being rescued by the quarterback were doused
by Resusci-Annie (the CPR dummy), who played the part of the damsel in distress.
Overall, my high school curriculum has
enriched every aspect of my life. I regret that I didn't apply myself and
learn more. And when my son inevitably asks that's my story, and I'm sticking
to it.
About the Author:
Kellie resides in central Illinois, is married and is the mother of six children.
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